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[bespredel]

What is it about the power going out that turns everyone into snivelling babies? It's a little dark, not the end of the god damn world. There are more than a few people here who come from times before electricity was even a thing, so stop being a baby just because you suddenly have to deal with some shitty candlelight for awhile. [ This, all spoken as though Yuri wasn't the poster child for a technological addiction. He's had to go without snapchat for what feels like a century now, and he misses instagram terribly. What the fuck is wrong with this place that it doesn't have some version of instagram?

But that's not really why he's decided to post to the network, anyway. ]

For all of the monsters and the shitty weather and the other bullshit, I have exactly one nice thing to say about this place:

They gave me back my cat. [ For a split second Yuri's expression softens, but it's gone too quickly to really make note of, as he spins his cellphone down towards the floor, where a small, fluffy white and black cat is winding around his ankles, meowing softly. ] If you're allergic to cats, don't come up to the third floor. I'll try to keep her contained to my apartment, but she's an escape artist. If you see her around, bring her back to me. And if anyone ever hurts her, I will fucking destroy you.

Comments

[ragnarsson]

Keep talking. Say something else to make me laugh. [He'll take Yuri seriously when he actually proves himself to be a threat.]

Here's a word of advice to the not so wise from someone whose killed people up close. If you want to threaten someone with death, just do it. Don't stand around talking about it.

[anotheroldsoldier]

No, it doesn't hurt to see what they can do. [The face gets a little laugh out of him.] I don't know what the title would be. I know some of the welcome wagon guys are Perimeter Guard but that's about it.

[bespredel]

[ Yuri makes a note of that little 'mostly', but for the moment he allowed it to pass. Instead, he focused on the ribbon she had brought, and his lips quirked. Not quite a smile- but something closer. ]

She'll love it. And her name is Korolevna. Wiggle that ribbon around a little and I'm sure she'll come out of wherever she's exploring. Gotta get used to the new place and all.

[bespredel]

Portal People sounds like the title of another bad horror movie. It can have sequels; Revenge of the Portal People, Attack of the Portal People, Ride of the Portal People... [ He coughs a bit, if only to disguise his own slight smile. ] Whatever their official title is, I'll talk to them.

[bespredel]

Yeah, it's not happening. Go to the library if you're desperate for a good read about cats and dogs. I'm no author, they'd probably write it better anyway.

[bespredel]

Blah blah blah. Better to be entertaining than boring. [ He huffs, scowling at the other and rolling back, flopping down on his couch and (unseen) kicking his feet up on the table, his cat hopping up into his lap, and beginning to knead at his leg. ]

If you don't think that isn't cute as fuck then I don't know what the hell is wrong with you.

[ragnarsson]

Better to be clever than foolish. [And Ivar is nothing if not clever.]

I will admit animals have a certain charm. But you have to be prepared in case things take a turn for the worse. Unless, of course, you'd prefer I eat you.

[barksnark]

Wait - what? You're a celebrity?

[anotheroldsoldier]

Ask them their job title too, now I'm curious. [He can't quite hide his own smirk of amusement.] I'd watch those.

[snarkbark]

You think they've got a kids section here?

[bespredel]

Any fool can criticize, condemn, or complain. And most fools do.

[ Yuri laughs, though, grinning and displaying teeth. It could have almost been threatening, but mostly, Yuri was just amused. ]

We'll see who eats whom, if it comes to it.

[bespredel]

Maybe that's what I'll make my next career. Production and screen writing of awful movies about portal people. [ Speaking of watching things, though... ] Apparently there's a second 'Revenge of the Rat' film- 'Revenge of the Rats. There's more than one pissed off science experiment now.

[bespredel]

Something like that, yeah. Big in certain circles- a sports star. Not like, a trussed up hollywood celebrity. Still have a fanclub though.

[bespredel]

Probably. I didn't really look for it while I was there.

[ragnarsson]

If you can actually overpower and get the better of me, I deserve to be eaten.

[Look at that cocky smirk. It's clear what he thinks of that idea.]

[bespredel]

Then you'd best hope it doesn't come to that.

[ Yuri can't help but smile though, the conversation feels absurd. He laughs despite himself, shaking his head and disturbing the cat in his lap, who huffs, indignant, and pads off out of screen. ]

[snarkbark]

Fair enough.

Anyway, what kind of cat do you have?

[barksnark]

Cool. How much is your autograph worth?

[ragnarsson]

[Ivar laughs in turn. It's been a while since he was able to just mess around with someone and get them to joke with him. Even psychopaths have moments filled with levity.]

I've gone sixteen years without having to turn to cannibalism to survive. I hope to go at least sixteen more.

[anotheroldsoldier]

Sounds like you've got a head start on ideas. [But it seems significant, that Yuri is mentioning a sequel to the movie they'd watched together. He's a little touched.] Oh yeah? When's that on?

[bespredel]

She's either a balinese or a himalayan; not sure. She was a gift from my grandfather.

[bespredel]

Truthfully I've never looked. I don't care much about that shit. I just want to do my best in representing my country, and grind the competition into dust.

[bespredel]

[ Yuri may not have killed anyone, or be a viking in truth- but his spirit had always been fierce. A warrior's soul. Ivar's slightly off-kilter tendencies didn't really seem to phase him at all. ]

You're sixteen? [ It's weird that they're so similarly aged, with such vastly different life experiences. It's part of what Yuri finds interesting about this place, and confusing, too. Yuri doesn't really think much about his own age- about how he's missed his birthday here, or trying to figure out how that works. Is he fifteen, or sixteen? Did it really matter when this place was so wildly strange in the first place? ] I can't even imagine what you're sweet sixteen must have been like. I hope you set something on fire, for good measure.

[bespredel]

Not like it's hard. They practically write themselves with a name like that.

[ Yuri glanced away from the screen for a moment, looking towards something off camera, before flicking back to the other, rolling his shoulders in a slow shrug that he hopes looks easier and nonchalant than it feels. ]

Whenever you feel like it. I borrowed it on DVD from the library.

[snarkbark]

Sounds beautiful.