video | un: iron.man

[buildsomething]

[The video opens on a very nice view of a warehouse ceiling, at least until there's a muffled curse offscreen and it tilts to reveal one Tony Stark. He's practically vibrating with the kind of manic energy that means he's been working for possibly too long, all hair standing on end and a few dark smudges on his face, but he looks pleased at least. Just behind him is a glowing blue hologram picking out the lines of something circular, spinning lazily like it was hurriedly abandoned.]

So hey, you all know those power plants out there in yonder abandoned wasteland? Sure you do. I know there's one working, but I've got some ideas for how to give the other ones a good kick. Thing is, I could use an extra hand.

[The metal arm that's been slowly rolling along behind him suddenly straightens and twists in Tony's direction, claw at the front contracting. Without looking back, Tony just snorts.] Not you. [The arm droops, somehow giving the impression of looking disappointed, but continues his trek to wherever he thinks he's going.]

Anyway, yes. Manpower needed. Preferably the kind that knows it's way around a welding iron, but I'll take what I can get. Oh, and a metric shitload of palladium. So if anybody's got a spare catalytic converter or twenty, let me know.

[He reaches for the phone, then pauses, something slightly sardonic flicking across his mouth.]

Or if one of you magic types wants to straw-into-gold me up some, I'll take that too.

Thanks in advance.

[Looking much more satisfied, he reaches the rest of the way to cut the feed.]

Comments

[ikols]

[ The smallest of smiles. ]

No, but there are sure to be things in the future that I want.

[buildsomething]

[He huffs an almost reflexive laugh.]

I'm sure. Alright, I will give you one piece of tech to be specified at a later date in exchange for a couple ounces. Deal?

[ikols]

A couple of ounces will power your catalytic converters, plural, for months. You do remember I spent an inordinate amount of time with a Stark, right? Tested means tested. This is no shabby earth-element. [ Cocking his head. ] I want tech and information on demand, whenever and wherever, for that.

[buildsomething]

If I was building catalytic converters, which I'm not. Not a chance in hell. [Said entirely pleasantly.] What's your second offer?

[ikols]

I'm the only person with access to this ore on the entire moon. There are no second offers; I want open access to tech and information, or I won't power so much as a lightbulb when your other options fade and you eventually come wheedling your way back.

No offence. You do wheedle.

[buildsomething]

I might wheedle.

[It's an easy admittance. In the business world, they call it 'negotiating'.]

But the fact is, I'm not giving you open access to anything, because the fact that you think you couldn't just ask fucking terrifies me.

[ikols]

You're not the Anthony I knew, I can't trust you not to lie to me like I did with him.

[buildsomething]

And you think bargaining it out of me would make me more likely not to lie?

[ikols]

I keep my promises. Don't you?

[buildsomething]

Occasionally.

[He gives the screen a thoughtful look for a moment.]

How about I promise not to lie to you.

[ikols]

That isn't to say you'll always tell the truth.

[ God of Lies says don't tell me how to do my job. ]

There's a game, it's ancient. Everyone from gods to interdimensional horror-terrors respects it and abides by the rules whenever it's invoked, it's called Three Truths. Whenever you play, you have to answer three questions honestly with no omissions or double-meanings, then you get to ask the other person in return.

If I supply you with the raw element you need, you will play Three Truths whenever I want.

[buildsomething]

[s t a r e]

Tell me you are not bargaining me into playing a high school drinking game with you whenever you feel like it.

[ikols]

A high-stakes game, alas with a distinct lack of alcohol.

[buildsomething]

Uh huh. Isn't is supposed to be two truths and a lie, anyway?

[ikols]

That's a car game.

[buildsomething]

What? No it isn't. When do Asgardians drive cars anyway?

[ikols]

Why do you think I can't drive cars?

[buildsomething]

Didn't say you can't, just not sure why you would. At least not long enough to play stupid car games.

[ikols]

It's a stupid anything-game, that's the point.

[buildsomething]

...you know what, fine. Stupid not-drinking games in exchange for magic ore. Deal.

[ikols]

I'll have a delivery drop some off tomorrow, let me know what you think of it.

[buildsomething]

I think I already regret everything.