001 # text # un: skyenet

[evite]

( broadcasting live from the dark cave that is her bedroom, skye opts for the safety of semi-anonymous texting when facing the wide open world of the network. granted, her username is literally a pun on her name, so it's not exactly the most subtle option in the world... but she's sticking to it. she thinks she's funny, anyway. )

is there a doctor in the house?

( or, you know, on the moon. )

att: my arms are killing me.jpg
if you make house calls, i'll pay double.

Comments

[evite]

if you mean a hug, the answer's maybe
don't tell anybody, though

( is she capable of being Serious about what could potentially be a massive disaster? obviously not. )

[otherflash]

I was thinking more along the lines of pizza.
But your secret is safe with me.

[ And he isn't just talking about the hug. ]

Think you're going to pull through?

[evite]

( there's a bit of a delay on skye's end. it's mostly her fiddling with the network tech, tinkering and tweaking enough so that the message is encrypted. it's not perfect — someone who really wanted to dig through her jerry-rigged coding could if they tried hard enough — but it'll do for now. )

i could probably eat an entire pizza right now
but i'd kill somebody for some actual painkillers

i feel like i'm getting stabbed by my bones

[otherflash]

I can deliver on the pizza, not so much on the pain meds.
I might be able to expedite the healing process though.

[ Temporarily lending her some of his speed might allow her to briefly gain access to the fancy accelerated healing abilities speedsters have. It most likely wouldn't fix her up completely, but it would significantly cut down on the time it would take her to recover normally. ]

[evite]

i want you to know i've tried every searchable combination of black market pain med drug supply known to man and still no results

this place can't be that goody two shoes
every city has the dude on the corner hawking vicodins
i just have to find him here

( will she say no to pizza? definitely not. as long as it's not pineapple. )

but i'm open to whatever you're suggesting, senor speedy

[otherflash]

Maybe they all decided to close up shop after making a fortune from the sickness going around last month.

But I know a few people who might have better luck.
I'll put them on the case.
Leaving your name out of it of course.

[ There will be pineapple pizza among others. He never brings just one. ]

I can swing by after the good doc has a proper look at you?

[evite]

if you trust them, i guess it can't hurt
are they all members of your after school specials club?

( or are they special in other, more relevant ways? )

and if you're not going to find me vicodin on demand, the least you can do is dazzle me with your company

[otherflash]

More or less.
Just not gifted like me.

[ Jason and Roy probably wouldn't appreciate him phrasing it like that. ]

If all else fails, I do have a pretty mean juggling routine I can bust out.

[evite]

that's probably a good thing
i only have so many zippy nicknames for speedy guys, you know
i'd hate to have to recycle them

( why is he endearing? why is she endeared? skye wants her money back. )

if it's really good, maybe i'll throw you a coin or two
pick up some spare change, maybe buy yourself a top hat for your routine

[otherflash]

There actually is another speedster here.
Some kid named Tommy if you haven't met him.
He thinks he's fast.

[ Wally isn't going to let the fact they haven't had an official race get in the way of his speedster pride. ]

A top hat would spruce up the act. Make it all classy.
But I will draw the line at a bow tie.

[evite]

if you mean the white haired kid with a penchant for cheap drinks? yeah, i met him
two for one beer night's pretty popular, i guess
i didn't know he was speedy, though

( she wonders how many people keep their abilities a secret. she didn't ask, though, so she can't be surprised he didn't volunteer the information. it's not like she did either. )

i'll only approve the bow tie if i get to be your magician's assistant

[otherflash]

In that case, you didn't hear it from me.
Not that I think he was keeping it a secret.
His network id is speed after all.

[ Add on that Tommy was referring to people as snails and it wasn't very hard to figure out. ]

Well the position is currently open.
Even if you only want to have a front row seat to how ridiculous I look.

[evite]

it'll be our little secret

( they can just start a tally. )

and if i'm signing up for this gig, i'm all in
slutty dress with the slit up to my waist, big hair, tacky lipstick -- the works
i just need to figure out my stage name
it's got to be somewhere in between super stripper and wannabe madonna vibes

[otherflash]

Go big or go home.
I like your style.
But if you're doing all that, I'm gonna have to expand my magical repertoire.
I want to be worthy of such commitment.

[evite]

i am admittedly decent at three card monty if you need a little hustle in your act
but i still say you should go full high class
maybe consider sword swallowing

[otherflash]

Always need some hustle.
But not sure about the sword swallowing.
Think there's any way we could make it work with an afterimage?

[evite]

i could throw swords at you and you could magically dodge them?
or play guess the lady's age while you sneak a peek in their wallets?

we could create a hustling empire with your party tricks, my friend

[otherflash]

Clearly this should be my new calling in life.
Though I wonder how my friends will feel about you corrupting me.

The only thing stopping us is there isn't anywhere for us to go once people catch on.

[evite]

there is so much more i could corrupt than just your attempts at making a living, for the record

and clearly that just means we need to hit up a few thrift shops first
we need to work on our stage personas, come up with our fake names

[otherflash]

Then I guess I'm going to have to keep a closer eye on you going forward.

But it sounds like you got everything planned out here.
All I have to be is the pretty face who does as he's told.

[evite]

oh no, what a tragedy

( he's going to have to hang out with her more? he'll have to keep an eye on her? what a shame, truly. )

i never imagined my first pillow princess would be a speedster
but hey, i'm flexible

[otherflash]

There are just some sacrifices that have to be made.

[ For some reason he gets the feeling this one won't be too painful for either of them. ]

As funny as that is
I assure you a pillow princess I am not.

[evite]

what a terrible life you must lead, making sacrifices to hang out with me

( the ultimate battle of ridiculousness. )

oh yeah?
and how exactly do you plan on proving that?

[otherflash]

Are we trying to be poetic now?
Oh the sacrifices I make for she who quakes.

[ Wally is thankful for her encryption so nobody else can bear witness to what a huge dork he is. ]

Now this might sound a little crazy.
Insane, even.
But you could take my word for it?

[evite]

you know, as far as flashy alter egos go, quake's pretty good
i might steal that

( she's pretty sure they all know. that magnitude of dorkiness is pretty hard to hide. )

and THAT sounds like a cop-out
you can totally do better than that