Cake Catastrophe (video; un: Sly Blue and RuffRabbit)

[bottombitch]

[ The scene may not be an usual one. There's a fire alarm blaring, the haze of smoke and the dismayed sound of a man who has fallen prey to some misadventure in cooking. Aoba whines about how he's ruined a birthday cake he toiled over for hours, makes a fuss at how he couldn't have possibly got it wrong, all the while trying to shut off the alarm.

Noiz is naturally filming this culinary disaster as it happens and is presenting it live on social media. Don't forget to hit subscribe, folks.

When he pushes open the door to the kitchen, there's enough smoke that it's left a dull haze hanging around the kitchen even with the ventilation fan on full blast and a certain blue-haired young man is flapping a dish towel frantically before the oven. The door is open and it belches smoke, makes him choke and cough as he hauls out the burnt remains of what may have been a cake.

He clearly did not do the cooking by the book, either through sheer laziness or by using some messy recipe and the cake turned out crazy. It looks more like a blackened bit of sponge than anything edible.

It’s at this point that the camera turns a bit to show the plain-faced cameraman, who reaches forward to rip a chunk of the blackened cake up from the smoldering mess, to take a bite.

Of course, he makes a face. Eyeing the camera now, he shakes his head. ]

Someone should teach this idiot how to bake.

Or at least point him to a cookbook.

[ And apparently, that’s too much for the victim star of the video to handle, as he runs toward the cameraman, hands out to take the comm from him. ]

You complete brat! Are you filming this?! Don’t eat that garbage, what are you doing--!?

[ Looks like the show is over, unless you want to reply to the video that now abruptly shuts off to help this pair of fools. ]


[ ooc: Aoba's dialogue is in blue, Noiz is in green. ]

Comments

action; closed to Noiz

[bottombitch]

[ Having wrestled the comm away from Noiz, he slams it down on the counter and rounds on him, hands on hips with a washcloth smudged with black smoke hanging from one fist completing the ridiculousness of his fury. ]

I can't believe you! [ But a moment later he's dropping his arms, shoulders slumping. ] I can't believe me...

[ His whine sounds miserable. ]

Where did I go wrong...

[bunnyblock]

[He's doing his best to pick bits of burnt charcoal black cake out of his teeth, a sour look on his face.]

Around the time you started baking.

[Blunt, rude, to the point.]

You're not good at this at all.

[bottombitch]

Nn! Why you...!

[ Aoba staggers under the weight of his failure, jolting a little as each barb strikes through him one after another. Noiz, are you sure you're not a sadist? ]

...Couldn't you have spared my feelings even a little bit? Maybe a 'thanks for trying'?

[bunnyblock]

[He might be a little bit of a sadist. But it's probably closer to 'he's brutally honest.']

...

I ate part of it anyway. [Just a reminder.]

text ; @altin

[bringbackgold]

Is that supposed to be cake?

Maybe...a cake mix would work?

text ; @Sly Blue

[bottombitch]

But it's for his birthday, isn't cake mix kind of like cheating?

Just how am I supposed to make something 'with love' if all I have to do is add some eggs and put in the oven?

text; @RuffRabbit

[bunnyblock]

Cheat next time.

DYING

[bottombitch]

Not you too!

[bringbackgold]

Edible is more important.

I think.

text; @RuffRabbit

[bunnyblock]

It's far more important.

This isn't edible.

text; un: bluebird

[exfine]

Are you two okay? Seragaki-kun?

[ FELLOW NAMESAKE TO THE RESCUE ]

[bottombitch]

No, I'm not okay!

This is a nightmare... I ruined Noiz' birthday cake!

He ate some of it, even though it was burnt into coal!

[exfine]

Ah, it's his birthday? Tell him happy birthday for me, please!

But oh dear, is he all right? He didn't get a stomachache, did he?

@sparrow; text

[flowlikewater]

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww nice one, losers

[bunnyblock]

It's a disaster, isn't it.

[flowlikewater]

totally, it's pretty hilarious

[ Genji you literally can barely boil water, you should not be throwing stones. ]

[bottombitch]

!!!

[ did you just warau at them, you -- wait, sparrow? His username isn't Red Sparrow or anything but it's just similar enough to feel his heart skip a beat for his lost friend. No, it's probably just a coincidence, but the fright that possibility gave him makes him a little slow to write his next message: ]

You don't have to be mean about it!

C'mon, I need help! This is a birthday emergency!

[flowlikewater]

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i'm not the one who's friend put their baking failure up on the internet

and not my problem my guy, sorry!

[ Poor Aoba, Genji is the farthest thing from a friend right now. ]

text | un: vakarian

[dispenserofjustice]

You might want to get him to the hospital. Whatever he ate looks deadly.

[Teasing? Definitely teasing.]

[bottombitch]

Maybe for you!

...

Do you really think I should take him to the hospital?

[ SWEATING NOW, did he just poison Noiz- please tell him ]

[bunnyblock]

Might clear up.

Might take me with it.

We'll see.

[dispenserofjustice]

I mean it's possible.

[text: un shigeru miyata]

[mysophobic]

If you want to learn to cook, I might be of some use.

[ Says the scary looking man. But he's being oddly docile right now. ]

[bottombitch]

[ FINALLY, someone who wants to help, not just mock his pain. Now if only he could see him via text... ]

I'm saved! I really don't know where I went wrong but...

I need to fix this, I ruined Noiz' birthday cake! Can you help?

[mysophobic]

Perhaps I can.

[ But judging by the fact he burnt a cake...Shigeru isn't so sure what Aoba is capable of. ]

Meeting in person would be easier, so whenever you're ready.