video @ellie

[pundemic]

Okay, okay, okay.

[Each of those words has a separate amount of emphasis. Ellie is holding her hands up and gesturing like she's trying to make an invisible margarita or something. Anyone who's ever been around teens should recognize the fact it's teenagerese for some form of frustration.]

I'm bored out of my fucking mind. Anybody want to go exploring? Monster hunting?

[Basically: her AU was that she never lost Riley, that it was the two of them that went across America in search of the Fireflies. She never met Joel at all, and her feelings about that whole mess are so mixed she's even willing to go shopping just to take her mind off it.]

Comments

video | username: bigbad

[idolpire]

[There is a lot going on in his life right now, Ellie, but it's a) the fact that there's a child on the screen that has him pausing and b) the language. Not that he hadn't heard it before, but from someone that young, he was expecting a hand to come from off screen and swat her.

It didn't happen. Pity.]

Shouldn't you be somewhere with adults?

[Yes, Spike. State the obvious.]

All tucked up tight and safe and not out trying to get yourself eaten?

[pundemic]

[lmao wow does 'not out trying to get yourself eaten' hit about ten million different sore spots with her.]

Missed the part where that's any of your fucking business.

[If anyone's tone could suggest you need a hobby, it'd be the one she adopts just there.]

You can take your 'tucked up tight and safe' and shove it up your ass.

[idolpire]

Oh, let's see. 'Come along with me on a magical adventure where you can watch me get munched on, la-di-da'. You do realize this isn't exactly a rabbit hole, Alice.

[Oh, please let her not be human so he could bite her... Or at least give her a good spanking.]

[pundemic]

Golly, because I've totally been here for four months and somehow magically failed to notice it's fucking dangerous.

[She wiggles her fingers to show just how very Done Me A Frighten this all is to her.]

Is your IQ always room temperature, or is this a special case for you?

[idolpire]

Tell you what; you go on out into the big wilds for your little adventure. I'll follow along with a box of popcorn for dinner and a show. Sound good?

[Listen here, you little twerp...]

[pundemic]

I've had enough adventure to last a lifetime, thanks. And you don't know shit about me, so get off my back with your bullshit lectures.

[That is the most sarcastic 'thanks' to ever grace a teenager's lips. At least as far as her metric goes.]

Man, what the fuck is your problem?

[idolpire]

Oh, I've figured out a few things. Like the fact someone clearly didn't get spanked enough.

[And yet he was amused as all hell. It was one thing when an adult played at the bravado, puffing up their chest and barking at the big nasty. It was a completely mesmerizing thing to hear it out of the mouth of someone younger than Dawn. Or... he assumed she was. She looked it. Ages were silly things when you were beyond them mattering.]

No problem, Pet. Just wondering how much of you is going to get wasted on the ground before I get there.

[pundemic]

[She's definitely about to say something incredibly incendiary back at that when--

what the fuck does he mean wasted.

She can't help the clench to her gut and the fact that she has to take a few minutes away from the comms because the place her mind jumps immediately is--

Well.

She only knows one group of people who'd describe a dead body as something wasted. When she actually keys on her device again she looks perhaps a bit paler, but no less annoyed or determined.]

Who the fuck are you?

[idolpire]

[She'd popped off for a while and he'd figured he'd scared her off. Good. Children shouldn't be running around being all mouthy an-- oh. She was back. And still saucy.]

Spike. And you're a mouthy little thing, aren't you?

[pundemic]

And that's a stupid name, but [she spreads her hands] here we are.

[Okay, nvm, that ridiculous name just removes literally all fear.]

[idolpire]

Right. Least I picked it. 'Ellie'. You know that's what people call elephants, don't you? Is that what you are? A giant, floppy eared elephant?

[Congratulations, Ellie. You had a new nickname.]

[pundemic]

[She looks Distinctly Unimpressed.]

Is that supposed to be an insult? Elephants are great, fuck you.

[Loyal, smart, fucking gigantic. No one messes with an elephant. Much worse things to be compared to.]

[idolpire]

[Welcome to knowing Spike, Ellie. This was the standard opinion.]

Yeah, sure. Great lumbering fat asses. Only thing good about them is how much blood they have. You can gorge yourself sick on an elephant.

[pundemic]

[She may have been born in an apocalyptic, empty wasteland of a world, but some things never really fade from public consciousness. Ellie? Totally knows what vampires are. She just sort of squints, and then--]

Are you trying to tell me you're a fucking vampire?

[She sounds incredulous, amused and utterly disparaging all at once. Look, when the popular vampiric franchise in her universe is a thinly veiled riff on Twilight, girl's gonna have some opinions.]

[idolpire]

Not fucking at th--

[A sigh.]

Right. Language. Even if you've got a potty mouth. Last thing I need is the pitchforks out because I said a naughty word around ears that say worse. Yes, Effalump. I'm a vampire. Put that out there more than once, miss 'I've been here forever, la la la'.