riverview | Video; thunderer [Thor 3 Spoilers]

[You can tell from the moment Thor's face appears on camera, he's been through hell and back. His hair is almost entirely buzzed down, save for the tufts on top, with markings shaved into the sides. His eye is covered by a black patch, indicating an injury that he isn't happy to talk about.]

I've made some changes. [Bluntly, as if he consented to any of this.]

What else.. Some things have happened at home that may be of interest to some of you. [He hums, considering.] Odin is dead. I have another sister? Her name is Hela. Mjolnir is destroyed. Banner is alive. [He feels a little guilty revealing that one, but he thinks someone deserves to know.] I fought the Hulk. I won. I met a real, live Valkyrie- And Asgard is.. [A people, not a place, but..] The realm has been destroyed. My people are seeking refuge, I suppose I understand now what displacement feels like.

I have the remains of Asgard in a ship, floating through space. If a portal could open for them, that would be extremely useful to me right now. I'm a king with no land or people, now. Very poetic. [Does he seem terse? He's kind of tense.

And then Loki comes barging in, looking very much the same and carrying a large parchment. He glances at the recording with a frown. He places the map of Earth on the wall, pinning it with a single dagger.]

Must you reveal everything? Put that away, I have work for you.

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Mm, but I'm sure she hasn't forgotten her promises to me.

[Really, he's just protective of that little tuft he has left.]

I did. What gave it away?

You can't take Lup seriously when someone's nearly killed me.

[She says things she doesn't mean.]

It was either that or you left and came back which would be kinda wild, has anyone done that?

[He knows people who've left and returned with no memories of the Quarantine, but it's clear that Thor knows he was here, so]

It was the first one, but we can pretend it was the second.

I was prepared mentally, but I didn't really consider physical changes. Nobody could have prepared for this monstrosity.

[He gestures vaguely at his hair.]

At least you've still got a body.

[Lup lost hers, so!]

Why wouldn't I have my body? I'd be dead if I didn't have my body.

[He has no idea what the story is there. Lucky he's so tactful.]

Oh, uh, when Lup did her canister thing it fucking tured her body to ash cause she's dead back home. [He realizes how that sounds, and quickly adds:] Undead, she's undead. It's a long story.

Oh.. [Thor feels a little awkward, but he smashes into this conversation like a dumptruck through a garden fence.]

Did you collect her into something, then?

Nah, she's kind of a ghost? Magic ghost, Loki actually made her a body to run around in so she'd stop phasing through my door at, uh, inopportune moments.

[That's not really the reason, but he makes an awkward sort of face, making it clear what he means by "inopportune" because he thinks it'll get a laugh out of Thor.]

[Thor scoffs. It's almost a laugh, Taako tried.]

I'm surprised he deigned to put a stop to that.

[Close enough?? Maybe]

I might've left that bit out when I asked him.

There's no shame in omitting information to make Loki do your bidding.

Pretty sure there's not a single person in the entire universe that can make Loki do their bidding.

He succumbs to electrocution surprisingly well. [Now he's sincerely smiling.]

[There it is.]

Should we be starting a club?

[HE HASN'T FORGOTTEN]

He wasn't hurt half as badly as you, but he deserved it twice as much. [Thor doesn't sound bitter, bygones are bygones, but it's true.]

That sounds about right, knowing Loki.

[He loves you, Loki.

But actually, something occurs to him.]

Hey, was I right about the hammer?

[About it being a focus]

You were right about the hammer. It was always just a hammer.

[Okay, no. He can't say that.]

A very useful, powerful hammer that I will sorely miss. But I think I can control it a little better now.

That's one for Taako.

[He seems very pleased with himself.]

I'm not stupid enough to go for a round two, but if you ever want someone to practice shit with, you know how to reach me.

I could certainly use the help. I'm confident it won't end in another pitiful cake, too.

The cake wasn't that bad, my dude.

When it's followed by the best cake in the nine realms and beyond, it doesn't hold up.

And I burnt it.

[He looks genuinely pleased with that compliment.]

Half the crew can't cook for shit, I've had a lot worse.

I know where my talents lie, and it's not there. But thank you.

You're welcome, sweetheart.

[He's kind of just being nice for the sake of being nice, but that in and of itself means something. He might not be as close with Thor as he is with Loki, but he likes the dude, and he can empathize with losing a world.

But he's not the type to talk about that sorta thing, especially not over the network. So:]

Gimme a call when you wanna test out your new power. Or if you want more cake.

I always want more cake. Your phone will never stop ringing.

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