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Video; un: bat.enthusiast

["Ash"'s device cuts on and shows the ground. The occasional tremble can be seen in the video and heard in his voice that has nothing to do with the cold. ]

I went for a walk today and found something I can only describe as horrifying. A body, with a note attached to it. I have made sure to hide the rest of this video after so those that do not wish to see the following image won't have to and we can just...discuss ways to calm my shaking nerves.

[The device pauses for a moment before moving to the body: it's been burned terribly, the corpse forced and tied into a position not unlike that of a cooked turkey. The device zooms in on the note, which has been worded with various bits of paper like an old school ransom note from one of those overly dramatic movies.

You know the ones. It reads: 'Help! I was left in the oven too long and missed my big day! Please eat me.' A sad face sticker is placed at the end. The video moves to show the communal housing building. Seems "Ash" here was on his way back home when he came across the corpse.]

What should I do?

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Yeah. I'd call the police.

And probably a therapist.

Know any good ones?

[Police or therapists.]

Not personally. That said, I'd like to think most are good guys.

I'm sure most are.

[He's lying of course; people are black holes capable of the worst things. They just need the right..incentive.]

Anyway, don't touch the body. Don't move it. Let the police handle it. Last thing they need is your prints all over the place.

[ Okay that.... that's GROSS. SUPER gross and she's sorry she gave in to her curiosity and looked. ]

T.. that's horrible..! [ And a sick, SICK idea of a joke. Who would do something like that? ]

Are YOU okay? Have you called the police.. or the Perimeter Guard yet...?

I'm...[He sighs. Someone get him an Oscar, ASAP.]

I'm fine. I think. I thought this may be faster since many of them have access to this..network.

[ Such a brilliant actor~! ]

Yeah, you're probably right.

God that's... I'm sorry, Ash, you shouldn't have to be exposed to something like that. I mean, it really has been quiet around here for the most part. It seems some sick person out there doesn't like the quiet. Have you been contacted by anyone yet?

[The best! Also, an accurate assessment, Marie. ~~Joker~~ Ash is greatly hating the quiet of this place.]

No one yet. God..do you think I'll be contacted by someone?

[ TSK, Typical bad guys! ]

Well yeah - you're not worried about that are you? I mean.. I've never really talked to them myself, but they're like cops, so they're only here to help. [ MAN UP ASH. It's just a gross fried body -- er... ]

I mean, you are the first one to find something like that..

...I am?

[Marvelous!]

Well... [ A pause to think about it. ]

At least.. I mean I'm not a constant presence on the network or anything, but I do glance at it from time to time. And I don't think I've ever seen anything like.... like what you found, so ... yeah, I'm... pretty sure you are.

[Cos he's the best at what he does!]

Oh. Interesting. Relieving to know, at least. A little.

[He still sounds a bit rattled.]

[ He gets a gold star for presentation and everything! ]

Um... if you're still feeling unsettled, maybe it'd be a good idea to go to the police station or the Perimeter Guard in person?

[Fuck yeah he does!]

They've barely even responded to this. I..think I should go hide somewhere for a few days.

[ ALL the other villains are jelly! ]

Well, that's why I was suggesting you go to the Perimeter Guard directly. [ If she had responded as Ladybug she could technically... maybe... well it's not really her 'area of expertise, so to speak. ]

Do you have somewhere you can go?

No, though I guess anywhere else would be fine.

(What...the hell is he seeing? Noctis has seen death, even murder, but it never been like this. It was quick, if not painless. The person who killed this man had done so playfully, like he was a piece of a game, insignificant and material instead of human.

It pisses him off. Immediately, Noctis can feel his blood boiling.)

What the hell?!

(The messenger isn't the perpetrator. His anger isn't aimed at the 'Ash', but he can't mute his response.)

What kind of messed up game is that?

[It's a good thing his end is off now, video wise, because hoo-boy--Noctis' reaction has him grinning from ear to ear as he listens. Such righteous anger! He loved it!

Still, he needed to calm himself down, lest he give it all away too soon. When Noctis is done, Ash's voice can be heard coming back.]

I'm..not sure. Someone's idea of a joke, perhaps.

That's a sick joke!

(His anger hasn't faded while he was forced to wait. Instead, he tried to figure out where the body was located. Humans weren't something to be toyed with like they were pawns in a game.)

Where are you? I'm near the apartments too.

[I meaaaan they kind of are angry pretty boy. they kind of are.]

I'm--[The device seems to be jostled about as "Ash" feigns being attacked from behind, complete with sounds of effort and pain.]

(Are not.)

Hey! (The camera shakes as Noctis moves closer, almost as if he believes doing so will allow him to change his view.) Hey! Talk to me!

Can you hear me?!

[ Oh, The hoodie was watching, something about this likened to much to his dead informant in the woods. It was time to get to work. ]

[Peaks over Todd's shoulder and watching the feed.]

Tt, thought you said there was no crime here? That sure looks like a murder to me...

[ Jason leans on his hands, his elbows on the desk as he glared a bit at the screen.]

I said not much. This however. This is the second body.

[ He pulled his phone up killing the video so he could open the pictures of Puzzle's body in the snow.]

This was my informant. [ He leaves out, also a drinking buddy.] We found him a week before you arrive. On the trail me, Bucky and Keith had to travel. It was clearly a set up, but thats when I got sick, so I've been a little busy.

How long ago did you encounter the other body? Were they burned in the same manner? [He says since Jason didn't seem inclined to hide any of this info from him.]

About a week and a half before your arrival. And yes, burned just the same.

Can I see pictures of the previous crime scene? [This is sadly a normal question in this family. He, of course, will be disappointed if you don't have at least some record, Todd.]

Yeah, one second.

[ Isn't it normal to share gorey pictures with family members? Jason was taking screen caps of the video as they spoke to get the best he could of the body. Keeping them all in the same folder before handing the phone back to Damian.]

I'll steal some copies of the crime scene photos tomorrow at work.

[Sure, didn't they do this at the first Thanksgiving or something? He sets the phone down and opens the file, but it was just photos. No list of possible suspects, no reports of toxins in the body or even if burning was the root cause of the death. That could easily have been done to cover something up. There isn't even an id aside from "He was my informant", so essentially working with a John Doe here. A week and a half Todd. You had a week and a half.]

Okay, this one is different in so many ways. [Are you even paying attention? And his family used to get on him for missing details! He hasn't had much to focus on since he'd gotten here so he is paying close attention now.] First, he has body parts missing while the other guy is tied up and doesn't seem to be missing anything.

Second, this one has a note that I don't see you attempting to decipher. [No notes on the note, Todd, really?]

[ Well, duh, what else would they have done? He had been sick, and had to catch up on work so he didn't lose the job that actually paid his bills. AS much as he wanted to solve the case it had to come second to all of that. ]

The first one was also moved. I dont have the scene photots for the after, but I was there when we found the body, and I can tell you he was moved after he died. I also think the missing parts of him are a sign. We used to call him puzzle becuase he was scatter brained. Always missing a few peices of every conversation. So, peices of the puzzle are missing. Someone thinks their funny.... as for the note.

[ He stood up, leaving the chair go grab his jacket. Pulling out a dinner napkin and sitting it down.]

I was working on it but I had to stop. Niks gets headaches from letters.

At least you can tell me that much. [Damian, as usual, does not sound impressed, but that "Thinks their funny" M.O. sounds pretty familiar. But no, the Joker was back on earth. The people that run this place wouldn't think to bring that kind of person here, right?]

What the hell is a Niks and why should I care that he gets headaches when he tries to read?

[ Jason had thought the same, but was blissfully happy the clown wasn't there...and if he was by gods he was getting some C4. Handle the problem the way the Joker handled him. It would be cathartic.]

Nico Di Angelo, the son of Hades. You'll find that's his only flaw. You'll love him Little D. He can raise the dead to talk to us.

[Damian is just suddenly staring at you hard. His mouth set into a tense line.] ...If he can raise the dead then why haven't you had him use his skills to talk to the victims?

We already did, it didn't work that well, Puzzle was always a fucking coward, even in death he wouldn't speak up. So, I have to sneak Nico into the other body which is a little more under lock down. Considering I work there it's not hard, but sneaking Nico in will be.

[This brings back a lot of memories... of people he's had to kill, and of their wanton cruelty.

The phone gets a long, black stare before he tosses it down.]

( It does precisely the same for her; losses she's suffered, lives she's had to take.

Her mouth presses into a firm line to see it, gaze hard and steely as she wonders just how her office is going to handle this. But that's a worry for later, if only a little bit. Tossing her phone onto the dining table, she moves to embrace him fiercely. They'll have to get to work, but not until they've reminded each other that they're not alone. )

Don't let go.

[You know, if Ivar hadn't seen Ash with a gleeful smile on his face hacking up a monster, he'd completely believe this. Oh, he's good. As for the body, Ivar's not too terribly shocked. He's seen worse. Hell, he's done worse.]

Looks like what we do to Christians back home.

[Some Vikings had a fondness for burning them alive.]

[Oh Ivar, it isn't about doing worse. Let him teach you the ways of true madness to sprinkle in with your Viking Insanity.]

What, tie them up like turkeys?

[Nah, he knows what you mean. Uh..same, Ivar. Same.]

[Teaching the Viking will be very dangerous...for everyone else. What he learns will only add to the insanity already present in his mind.]

No, although that would be amusing if we did. We just tie them to piles of wood and light them on fire.

[Right? So it'll be good! Great, even! Cos the villainy well is hella dry around here.]

That's..terrible.

[He sounds horrified, cos y'know. Appearances and all that.]

[Bah, even in his own mind, Ivar's no villain. ~~The show is called Vikings after all, so of course he's the protagonist.~~]

Sure. For them. But they'd do the same to use if they got the chance.

[He agrees, Ivar. He agrees.]

I'm not so sure that's true.

[It's true.]

You must have a higher opinion of people as a whole than I do.

[People were savage, brutal, and cruel. That was one thing that hadn't changed in a thousand years since Ivar's time.]

I try to. At least most of the time.

That optimism is definitely misplaced.

We'll see mister..ah...boneless?

Ivar The Boneless.

[He fiddles around with his device for a moment before making their conversation private.]

So are you going to tell me the real reason you cooked that guy up? Or was it just for fun?

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Video; un: bat.enthusiast

@maverick

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Video|@JaggedFan

Audio; un bat.enthusiast

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Video @KingFisherman

Audio; un bat.enthusiast

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I was very excited when I discovered Noctis is roomies with the Joker

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NOT HERE

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Video @the.boneless

Video @the.boneless

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Private