VIDEO, @GEKOKUJOU

[liquidate]

(in the beginning, it looks like suigetsu is trying to take a selfie with a particularly horrifying looking fish with teeth longer than its dorsal spines. but he lowers his peace sign, pulls the phone closer for a flattering view of double-chin, and grins into the camera.)

Yo, I'm Houzuki Suigetsu, and this is my first network post of all time. I'm gonna make an announcement to commemorate it, so listen, okay? I won't repeat myself just 'cause you wouldn't pay attention the first time around!

(hope your phone has a translator, because it's notably japanese, both spoken and written on the sign suigetsu lifts up. it looks handmade and like something a child in elementary school could cook up. and while there's an attempt at english, to appease the majority of the people here, both languages have poor spelling and even poorer handwriting.)

Do you like fish and fish-like things? Amphibians and, uh, things that look a lot like amphibians that I'm not too sure about? Well, look no further than—



(eyes creasing, there's a flash of pointy chompers that make him look like he belongs there.)

We were open before this, but I thought that there should be more of you guys going now that I work there. Like the sign says, we're open every single day except for Sunday, from nine in the morning till five in the evening. This might mean that you can't come, 'cause you're at your own job, but you should leave there and come here for a tour instead!

What do you think? It's a swell idea, right? Are you coming right now?

(a tilt to his head, raising the phone back up so only his eyes, his forehead, and his fish friends are visible. many bubbles are blown, many alien crab pincers are pinced. and honestly? it looks kind of fun.)

Lemme know if you are, so I can meet you at the entrance and give you one of my super special all-inclusive tours, with a bonus prize if you listen to my whole talk without interrupting. How could you pass an opportunity like this up?! The right answer is that you can't!

Suigetsu, out-o!

Comments

@s.uchiha, voice

[eyeforaneye]

[ ... ]

If you're not sure about something being an amphibian, shouldn't you study before you give tours? That, and you should also study your spelling and handwriting before making new signs.

[liquidate]

I'm studying as I go, Sasukeee. They have placards with their information on it, but I like to look 'em up online too!

(he sounds so happy. this is the happiest he's been for like, two weeks.)

Is the sign bad? I thought it was pretty good.

[eyeforaneye]

Don't make it that obvious in your advertisement; that's my point. [ But... there's something about the change in Suigetsu's demeanor that gets to him -- even him -- and his tone softens marginally. ]

I can't speak for the design of the sign. It just contains spelling errors.

[liquidate]

Ahhh, no way, really?

(a rustle and movement from his arm off camera as pulls it over again, obviously examining it when he purses his lips.)

How many mistakes? I can't tell... Is it "Aquarium"? That one was hard.

[eyeforaneye]

[ He doesn't need to rack his brain to remember; those were some pretty egregious errors. ]

"Beachside", "aquarium", and the formation of several letters and characters. For English you should be using a reference or it'll be too difficult. [ Yes, he researched what language everyone uses too, incredibly. ]

For Japanese... ah, well, you got that wrong too.

[liquidate]

(that's... so many errors and is... so embarrassing...

picking up the sign, so he can flip it over and keep most of the front obscured.)

M-Maybe I don't need a sign, then... People'll just know on their own anyway, 'cause it says on the building already!

[eyeforaneye]

[ ... ]

Is the back of the sign blank?

[liquidate]

...

Yeah, it's just this kind of poster board I got from the stockroom...

[eyeforaneye]

Then there's an unblemished side on which to try again. Do you need help?

[liquidate]

Ahhh, that's a great idea! You can write it for me!

(point missed)

[eyeforaneye]

I could. I won't. [ I only need four words to shut this down entirely. ]

I said I would help, not that I would do it for you.

[liquidate]

...

This sounds embarrassing. Don't make fun of me, when I screw up.

[eyeforaneye]

Is it more or less embarrassing than going through the rest of your life without ever knowing how to do it properly?

[liquidate]

More...

[eyeforaneye]

This will continue over and over again until you're properly educated.

[liquidate]

(a bullish snort out of his mouth, like a hock or a garbled sigh.)

Okay, okay. I don't know where to start, though.

[eyeforaneye]

It'll be too difficult to not do this kind of thing in person. How late will you be there today?

[liquidate]

(flips the sign back around, finger on the squiggly "5pm" that looks to be the most legible part of the whole thing.)

Five, so do you want me to come to the café afterwards to meet you? Or the apartment? Or I can stay here and you can come by and look at the fish while you teach me.

[eyeforaneye]

[ He debates another speech about why leaving exactly at closing time is unwise. And chooses to save it. ]

Stay there and I'll meet you. You already have the supplies gathered on site, correct?

[liquidate]

Er, by supplies you mean pens and paper right? They have a ton of that kinda thing.

(at least being taught here means the fish can watch and maybe learn a couple of things themselves.

suigetsu begins to rummage.)

I have a favourite pen, it's got purple ink! I'll show it to you.

[eyeforaneye]

That'll be sufficient to teach you the lettering. However we'll need whatever larger instrument you used to write on the sign if you want it to be readable from a distance.

[ Yes, we need more literate fish. ]

[liquidate]

Ah, you mean my chalk.

(lifts... this giant stick of salmon-coloured chalk...)

The sound it makes when it writes is horrible, but I had to use something and the girls said the chalk was best for the signs.