[ text | posted anonymously ]

[goblinemperor]

[ Maia is unfamiliar with advanced technology, so he checks and double-checks and triple-checks to make sure the message he is posting will not bear his name, before he asks: ]

What would you do with your freedom, if you had it for the first time in your life and never learned how to use it?

[ The question is awkwardly phrased, true, but he really is pretty desperate for advice. One way and another, he's been pent up and under supervision since he was born, and now he doesn't really know how else to be. ]

Comments

text; @markus

[compartmentalise]

[This type of scenario really speaks to him. He has more freedom here than he had in Detroit. Also does not go anonymous]

I don't know. What would freedom feel like to you?

[anon]

[goblinemperor]

[ Well, that really turned the tables on him, didn't it? Maia thinks for a few moments before he answers: ]

Being able to decide where I go and what I do and who I may speak to. Not being confined or observed. Blending in with a crowd. Choosing, rather than being chosen for.

[ You know, the basic stuff. ]

[compartmentalise]

[He wonders if this anon is an android. But then rethinks. There are probably others who deal with similar problems but aren't androids]

I have been taking walks and going into stores.

[goblinemperor]

[ It seems like such a basic thing, but... it sounds like a much better stepping stone than some of the other suggestions he's gotten. ]

That sounds like it would be a good start. Thank you.

May I ask... do you find yourself in a similar situation?

[ He had honestly expected when he posted this that all the answers would be hypotheticals, or that people would dismiss him entirely, unable to conceive how someone could be in his position. But it sounds like, perhaps, this Markus is walking the same path. ]

[compartmentalise]

[It does seem like a small thing, but when most of the time you're blocked from going into stores, being able to do it feels pretty huge]

Yes. I've met some nice people who are encouraging me.

[goblinemperor]

And you do not feel awkward, that they are so far ahead of you?

[ The language is imperfect, but Maia doesn't know how else to put it - this sense of being immature, behind, and the fear of revealing that to anyone. ]

[compartmentalise]

No. I haven't experienced much, so it isn't a surprise that I still have a lot to learn.

[goblinemperor]

I envy that outlook a great deal. It is... very reasonable, yet I cannot imagine feeling the same way. My own inexperience is a source of great shame for me.

[ Thus the anonymity, and all his slightly clumsy efforts to speak differently and erase all clues that it is him having this conversation, just in case anyone recognized it. ]

[compartmentalise]

Does it help to know there are others experiencing the same thing?

[goblinemperor]

It does. More than I know how to say. I did not imagine, in posing this question, that anyone would be in the same position.

Perhaps honesty around this subject is something I must merely practice. In my own world, it was imperative that I not show ignorance, or weakness, or doubt.

[ Or any variety of other things, but the longer that list gets, the more depressing it sounds, so he's just going to stop there. ]

[compartmentalise]

It could be different for everyone. I was encouraged to ask questions and explore what I did not understand.

[goblinemperor]

[ Maia had had to ask many, many questions, when he first came to court. But the difference there was he'd had Csevet. No matter how stupid, how basic something was, he could ask Csevet, and know that it was safe. Here... he doesn't have anyone like that. ]

It was good advice. Asking this question, in this forum, has been very illuminating.

Thank you, for encouraging me, as you have been encouraged.

[compartmentalise]

You're welcome. I hope it helped.