video. username: s.cougar

[radicalspeed]

Ah, to be young and alive! Breathe in the air, enjoy the scenery, get to know the people...

Let me tell you a little philosophy...

[The young man in the video — he's such a character in hair alone (what on earth is going on with it) — sits in his rented hospital wheelchair in his simple apartment space on floor 14 (needs a little work, he thinks, not nearly enough reading material or flashy bits). In one hand, he's got some silly romance novel that's clearly forgotten, and he looks a bit weary, a bit hollowed out from battles not yet mentioned, but he's clearly so very jazzed about the opportunity to be here in Riverview. After all, he'd thought he'd be a dead man, and though he's hardly out of the woods entirely, he has more time to keep going! More time to really go the extra mile -- literally! Ahahahaha!

Oh, yes, the philosophy. Ehem.

At this point, his mouth is moving a mile a minute.]



That's the fun of travel, and there's no better travel than hopping worlds; think about it...! Of all the universes and all the galaxies, you were extended a hand to this place — a one in a trillion chance, perhaps more, to be among the stars! Or perhaps to shoot across time and space like one...! More time to chase after longevity, to meet records, to dash down the sin of sloth. We all have the right to free will! Free will to fall in love, to learn and grow and develop new and interesting hobbies and ideas and concepts of what it is to be our own individual self; individuality is key! [He's balancing on one wheelchair wheel, spinning in a circle. Stop him. STOP HIM.] But what's the point of all that if you're too slow to get around to it, huh?! Don't let yourself hold you back!! If you want something, reach for it, so you know what that means—?!

[He stops. Drops back onto all his wheels, so tickled.]

Anyone interested in wheelchair racing?

[Sometimes (most times) he just can't help himself.]

Comments

[radicalspeed]

Already! Already, he says!

Don't you know, that's one of the words I hear the most?

[The fella is certainly really content in his own skin, which is a bit of a paradox, considering the state of him; his pant legs are rolled up, and there are clear bandages that go all the way under his comfy as hell slippers. Regardless, he can't help but generate a confounding amount of positivity!!

He motions for Osomatsu to come over.]

Just stand right here, and I'll do the rest, huh?

[... There's no side cart or anything. Huh.

Peculiar.]

[relieable]

[hey, as long as the guy is happy, it's cool, right? it doesn't matter what state he's in, and Osomatsu's not going to ask him about whatever accident happened. for now, he does as he's told, coming to stand where the man requested]

Sure. [he's happiest when someone else says they'll do all the work]

1/2

[radicalspeed]

[... A deeply ominous cackle sounds beside him.]

2/3 just kidding

[radicalspeed]

[And just as suddenly, a strange, psychadelic color glows around him and the wheelchair; railing from the rooftop altogther vanishes, or rather transforms itself onto the wheelchair. A hot pink paint job appears -- and then what appear to be incredibly unsafe and large rockets on the back. The wheels grow larger, and something under the wheelchair whirs like an engine.

And you, Osomatsu, well. You will find yourself getting pulled backwards by a seatbelt, right into the comfortable leather of a suddenly grown passenger seat. Cougar adjusts his glasses, feels a swell of energy and pride like no other and reaches for -- is that some sort of steering stick--]

Skies clear, air traffic looks great!!

[radicalspeed]

LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!! AHAHAHAHA!!!!

[AND SUDDENLY THE ROCKETS ARE BLASTING AND THE TWO-MANNED-WHEELCHAIR-TURNED-AIRCRAFT GOES ARCHING OVER THE TOP OF RIVERVIEW AT 130 MILES PER HOUR LIKE A SHOOTING STAR OF DEATH AS OSOMATSU'S BACK TRIES TO MELT INTO THE LEATHER SEATING SCREAAAAAAA]

[relieable]

[...

let it be known that, on this day, Osomatsu Matsuno found a newfound respect for the ground. never, in all his years, had he missed it as much as he does now.

his whole face seems to contort as they whoosh through the sky, his cheeks practically pulling apart from his skull in cartoonish fashion. he wants to hold onto something, anything, so he grips the seat, thankful for his seat belt. at least they are practicing safety! that's important!

he's silent for the first few yards, then all of Riverview might be able to hear his screams.

holy shit. good bye, cruel world]

1/2

[radicalspeed]

[Cougar in the meanwhile looks absolutely ECSTATIC while your lunch is crawling back out of your stomach inch by inch... and is oblivious to your torment. The screaming is inter-spliced with Cougar's manic philsophy-ing:]

Y'know, Pal, I'm proud of you! Facing great heights, literally! Life's all about finding new ways to conquer your inner demons, yanno?! Wheelchair-smeelchair, that's what I say, never let anything stop you from riding the wind and catching the sunlight, that's what I say, don't you think so buddyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy--!!

2/3 always with the additions

[radicalspeed]

[The wheelchair rocket of death suddenly starts a SPIRALING DEATH DROP DOWN as the rockets give way -- and all that's left is a grand drop straight down, Tower of Terror style. But then -- then....!

A cute little parachute pops out of the top, and they gently... gently... start a decline.

People are probably staring at the slowly drifting mini-car in confusion from their windows, one imagines, before it softly... delicately... lands in a parking lot. In a parking space, actually! They sit for a moment in silence.]

[radicalspeed]

... Oh, yeah!

[He looks over at his passenger, as one of the decorative horns pops off the side of the superwheelchaircar.]

Sorry, I didn't get your name.

don't stop me now playing in the background

[relieable]

[things happen so freaking fast that Osomatsu isn't sure how to process everything. why did this wheelchair turn into a vehicle? why were they flying? why was this maniac let out of whatever wacky asylum he came from?

so many questions, and, yet, as they plummet down to the earth, Osomatsu just prays that he'll be able to see tomorrow. he continues to scream, all up until the parachute pops out, and then his screams die down in favor of taking in everything in stunned silence.

the vehicle comes to a stop finally, and Osomatsu is still gripping the seat. when Cougar looks at him and asks his name, there doesn't seem to be a hair out of place on him. Osomatsu looks like a frightened cat, though. his mouth works, trying to find something to say. when he does, he's yelling again]

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? WHY DID... HOW... JUST... WE COULD HAVE DIED!

[radicalspeed]

Huh? That's Radical Good Speed, of course.

[He glances over from his seat, confused.]

But died's a little dramatic, don't you think? I'm way better than you're giving me credit for.

Besides, what's life without a little adrenaline?

[OH GOD THE WHEELCHAIR CAR IS MOVING AGAIN --

... The speed limit, very relaxingly.]

[relieable]

[Osomatsu braces for MOVEMENT... but finds they're not going at super sonic speed again. okay]

Adrenaline's one thing, I thought my heart was gonna leap into my throat.

[but he's not that mad. anymore, at least]

The name's Osomatsu.

[radicalspeed]

The name's Cougar — pleasure to make your acquaintance.

And I gotta say, you have a healthy pair of lungs on you. Have you ever considered taking up opera?

[He's being a little shit. But a pleasant one.]

[relieable]

[ah, a joke... well, Osomatsu can appreciate that, at least. he grins slightly]

Have you ever considered go-kart racing?

[radicalspeed]

You know, I would've, but most of my colleagues back home knew better.

[Ahaha~!]

I do plenty of racing on my own; you know, it never hurts to shrink time a little. Gives you more time to do everything else...! Even a few seconds more to go about your life instead of traveling from point a to b is a blessing, right?

[relieable]

Sure, I can see your point. [heh] I think I'm almost the complete opposite, though... I'm a huge time-waster who likes to take things slow.

[too slow, sometimes]

But I do get impatient every now and then.

[radicalspeed]

Then you needed that pick-me-up!!

It's no good, wasting time. Before you'll know it, you'll be on your last few minutes wondering where you put all that time at.

[He gives a mild smile, looking where he drives. And god, this must be the oddest looking shortcar.

Is that the word for it??]

But you also have a point. Racing through life, sometimes you... miss things in the rush.

[relieable]

[now that they are driving at a normal speed, Osomatsu's going to look around, enjoy the view from the shortcar]

Yeah, I don't wanna miss anything. [honestly, Osomatsu's pretty good about jumping into things face-first. he'd shown that just now, hadn't he?] You ever miss somethin' by going too fast?

1/2

[radicalspeed]

[Oh, absolutely. He's missed all sorts of things, in his youth. Crucial relationships, love, a home, a decent way of living. He missed a lot of things that made life worth living, that made the end of a life more filling. He drives for a moment, thoughtful, looking back with a little smile.]

Who, me...?

[radicalspeed]

I've probably missed a few decent road trip games, to say the least...!

It's hard to play I Spy when everything's a blur and your passengers never participate!

[relieable]

[oh... that's a good one! Osomatsu laughs]

I Spy isn't that fun anyway! In fact, it's kinda stupid, so you're not missin' much.

1/2

[radicalspeed]

[He glances over with a friendly little smirk. Not a bad guy, then! And heck, he recovers quickly from being absolutely terrified, to boot; Cougar's gotta admit, it's not too shabby, that personality of yours. Maybe you're sturdier than you look. (He just won't mention the high shriek you had all that while.)]

I like the way you think, Oromatsu--!

[radicalspeed]

[... Ah. A sharp pang runs up his legs and spine, and he winces a little; Osomatsu's seatbelt dissolves, followed by the ceiling over his head, and then one of the cool spikes on Cougar's side of the weird car-hybrid. As it slowly pulls over, it all just abruptly dissipates, leaving Osomatsu to tumble a short fall onto his butt to the sidewalk while Cougar plops back into a once again (albeit mildly dented) wheelchair.

Shoot, and they were getting closer to the apartment on such good time again. Cougar wipes a sleeve across his brow, feeling a headache at his temples and a slow weariness grow in his limbs; his doctor's gonna chide the hell out of him, he just knows it.]

Oops. My bad.

... Maybe not the best time for me to shrink... Well. Time.

[Go figure, the guy in a wheelchair wasn't at his strongest at the moment.]

[relieable]

[eh? What happened? Where did the fancy mini car go? Osomatsu lands on the sidewalk, not too roughly, but not gently, either. He's not in any pain, though he looks confused as anything]

...Huh? [he blinks, then turns to stare at Cougar. He'll, uh... he'll correct the name later] what was... That?

[radicalspeed]

[Cougar lays his glasses to sit on that long, strange sliver of hair that he can't seem to get slicked back; it works out in his favor, right? But he also looks a bit tired, like he'd been when he'd made the broadcast. Still! No reason to be down on yourself; he looks proud, actually.]

That was my Alter, of course! Radical Good Speed, I call it.

I can turn anything with wheels or wings into a thing of beauty.

[Among other talents. But he usually keeps that all hush-hush until he really needs to use it; after all, he prefers not to get too carried away with the legwork. Life's shorter than it was when he was 15 and darting all over the land like some whirlwind warrior.]

Buuut I guess I need to keep my work to a minimum, until the rest of me can catch up.