riverview | Text [User: South.of.Nowhere]

You're the one who keeps talking about fighting naked. I'm just rolling with it.

[Okay, running with it. Same difference.]

Maybe I aim a little higher.

I only said naked once, you're the one who keeps coming back to it.

[She insists, sparing a glance over her shoulder at him before giving a curious noise]

How's the ranking go, anyways? Mud, jello, then blood? Is pudding in there somewhere? And what about baby oil?

Not my fault.

[It means it's her fault, for putting the idea in his head.]

I don't know. Should make whichever's hardest to wash off the highest.

Probably glitter. Glitter wrestling. [Because that shit is the worst.]

I mention being naked one time and it's just stuck in your head? I know I'm hot, but fuck

[She's teasing, there's a laugh in her voice and the tension in her shoulders is almost entirely gone]

...no one should be wrestling in glitter. That's just asking to go blind.
I know I make the one-working-eye thing look easy, but it's not

Maybe it's been a while, okay?

[Shut up. He's never mentioning her naked again. ]

Maybe no one's made it to that level yet. You should just stick to normal wrestling.

Getting me all flustered with that sweet talk

[She can't help it, it's definitely all his fault here]

Normal naked wrestling..?

The fact I haven't been laid in god knows how long ain't exactly sweet talk.

[Sounds kind of pathetic, really.]

How about normal, naked gymnastics? [If she's taking suggestions and while the path they're on is still empty of things that need killing.]

No shit, I was meaning instead of saying 'wow you're hot' you're just 'jeez I'm desperate and talk of any naked lady is distracting'

It's sarcasm

[Because she can relate, she's been preoccupied with trying not to get killed or captured, she hasn't really gotten laid in. Well. Longer than she'll admit]

I did gymnastics as a kid, actually. Though that is probably more like a stripper than anything like that.

[Seriously?] Are you seriously criticizing me right now for not being a goddam creep?

[He kept it joking, the way Marines joked with each other. Not creepy.]

You know, NOT the kind of detail you need to be sharing in the middle of this conversation.

Wouldn't say criticizing, just clarifying if you were hitting on me or just commenting on the naked subject for other reasons.

[She hasn't joked with someone in a long time, honestly, it isn't her fault she's rusty]

...you brought up gymnastics I was just saying I used to do it before.

[He cannot clarify that, because he doesn't know himself, honestly.]

Just making conversation. While we wait for other shit to kill.

[Which, if the world were kind to Frank Castle, would be right about now. NOW. Now? Yeah, nothing.]

So you're a space marine stripper. That about right?

[She simply gives a 'mhmm' to that, loudly judging from behind her helmet but letting it drop with that]

Who wrestles in blood, apparently. But not glitter cause I want to keep at least one eye functioning.

But what's that make you, the guy throwing money at me or the one I'm fighting?

[Those are the only options, sorry not sorry]

[He hears that mhmmmm.]

Maybe we'll run into something with glittery blood. You could break new ground. [At this point, he just doesn't want to let the point die, because she thinks he's some kind of weird pervert and no SHE is the weird pervert here.]

You should charge more for the guy to be the one fighting you. Just saying.

Honestly wouldn't really be surprised if we did. But if we don't next time you can bring a handful of glitter and just throw it at me and whatever beast I saved you from, then it'll have glittery blood.

[Which is exactly what happened-!

And she's definitely not the weird pervert, he totally is, and she'll prove it with a couple simple questions]

Oh yeah? That's the kind of stuff you're into? Blood wrestling and getting beat up by a woman for money? It's oddly specific.

I'll be sure not to aim at your face. [Like a true bro. ]

Well, I tried getting beaten up by guys, but, fuck, that didn't do it for me. [Didn't work out so well for them, either. ]

-[Theres a fun joke here but she manages to take the high road instead] my eye thanks you.

Can’t imagine it would. Well- if you ever need a chick to kick your ass, just say the words. I’d be happy to. [And how exactly does she mean that? It’s anyone’s guess...]

[It's a heroic effort on her part, surely.] It's no fun if you can't see.

[He tilts his head, as if thinking.] I don't know. Everyone else has to earn that right. [Right back at you with the mysterious utterances.]

I mean, I could probably do this blindfolded but, nothing else permanent please [ She is positive she could handle just about anything even if she couldn’t see, but she’s in no hurry to test it.]

So, just aim for my chest, should be a safe bet [ nothing suggestive there]

[She glances back at him, giving a little curious sound] oh yea? How’s that?

All I need is another idiot who fights blindfolded. [Don't tell him she's some sort of goddam ninja, too.]

Just saying, there's a line of people wanting to kick my ass. Either you take a number and wait a while, or fight your way to the top of the list.

...You know many people who do that? [Because that sounds both idiotic and kinda awesome- if he can properly fight while blind, that is]

I mean, I could definitely fight my way to the top like some stupid video game end boss, sure. But you should make an exception for me. I'm cute as hell and you already seen how well I fight, should pop me right up in the front. [Definitely how it works]

Nah, just one guy. One man punching crusade back home.

So, because you're cute, you should be on the top of the list to beat me up. [Is this what she's talking about.]

Text [User: South.of.Nowhere]

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My phone autocorrected cum to fun but that still works l o l

damn you, phone.

you try to take the high road and not make a cum joke and the phone still punishes you

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