@R.Greenhilt: Video

[greatcleavage]

Good afternoon. My name is Roy Greenhilt.

[Someone isn't in a festival mood; Roy wears his armor and carries his sword as a rule, and today is no exception. In fact, he has carefully chosen a spot by the wall to remind the viewer of the hostile world outside this contains area, and by extension, the moral and ethical responsibility they each have to aid others on this world who might have to deal with it.]

[Presentation, Roy has learned, counts for a lot.]

I'm looking for accompaniment on a mission outside of these walls. According to city officials, who have detected this via some sort of sensing array, there's a group of intelligent beings out there whose numbers are decreasing, and I believe this needs to be investigated and these people helped, possibly by bringing them back here.

To that extent, I am looking for people who are capable of driving the automated vehicles here, as well as those capable of protecting them. Healers or those with ranks in Heal would also be appreciated. If I'm able to assemble a small group we'll be departing as soon as possible, so please be aware this may curtail your festival experience.

[That ought to cut down on people who wound rather be partying than helping others, at least.]

Please contact me at your earliest convenience if you are willing to come along on this expedition. Thank you for your time.

Comments

[greatcleavage]

I expect everyone to pull their weight as necessary, although the ideal would certainly be that we don't NEED to fight anything and can simply travel there without hindrance.

It may shock you to hear I don't expect that to actually happen.

[smokedout]

Didn't answer my question, Greenhilt.

No one's gonna put in equal effort, especially if you're paying them equally regardless. So are you giving out incentives for greatness or not?

[greatcleavage]

That seems to me like it's just asking for one giant argument over what 'greatness' is and who achieved it. Which would bog us down into immense and complicated contracts. I've gone that route in the past, and I discovered that it ends up complicating matters more than it does any good.

[smokedout]

....So you're not an idiot after all. Never can tell with good guys.

Alright, equal shares then. Name's Dodger. Don't expect me to cover anyone's ass if we run into trouble, but I can drive well enough and I got some first aid knowledge. But unless I'm getting an extra share, gonna draw the line at not letting anyone die. If they get hurt, it's not my problem.

Whatcha got for leadership experience?

[greatcleavage]

I've been leading an adventuring party for some time now in a quest to stop a lich from gaining ultimate power, which has of late branched into 'stop the gods from destroying the world'.

(I'm working on the strong assumption that we can be displaced through time as well as space, because otherwise me being here has resulted in my world's end.)

[smokedout]

what are you, a tabletop character?

[greatcleavage]

...that's the founding conceit of the comic, yes, but we're REALLY trying to cut down on breaking the fourth wall these days.

[smokedout]

are you

are you fucking serious

holy shit

[greatcleavage]

Look, honestly -- you don't need to pretend, let's just downplay it, okay? We're trying to be much more serious and story-driven...

[smokedout]

hold on i just need to get this straight

do you actually, seriously believe you're in a comic strip? and you gotta work by D&D rules and be a hero and shit??

[This is incredible.]

can i have whatever you're smoking?

[greatcleavage]

It's not a question of belief. And my Lawful Good alignment is an adoption of choice that has no bearing on anything but my own personal desires and aspirations.

[smokedout]

[Okay he's... he's going to calm down enough to try and play along. Because fuck it, y'know?]

okay, sure. and my chaotic neutral alignment is outside of my control too. i aspire to take care of myself by whatever means necessary.

[greatcleavage]

It isn't out of your control, but I'm not worried about it. I'm accustomed to working with a party of varied alignments and accommodating for that.

[smokedout]

good, I can respect that.
i'd hate to be stuck with one of those goody-two-shoes that needs to FIX everyone.

when are we shipping out, soldier?

[greatcleavage]

Once I make sure we have enough people to defend the trucks and drive them to get us there. I'll let you know.