Video. A Friendly School PSA.

[shoplifter]

 [The feed opens with a huffy looking Laura, sitting in front of the screen like it's a PSA announcement or some such — and judging from the glancing up at what must assuredly be a teacher, it's exactly that. Or something. She scowls at the camera again before looking down at the paper held in her dainty little hands that have totally never hurt anyone ever, no sir. She reads it blankly, and it's very clearly she's the worst podium speaker in the entire universe:]

I have agreed.... to read aloud, so that I will not be suspended for the week.

I would like to formally apologize for anyone I have ever stabbed, kicked, punched, or bitten... It was not my intention to hurt anyone and I will try my best from this point on to control my temper, both — in the complex and at school. [She wrinkles her nose, looks deadpan at the camera, and continues.] I am sorry to Tabitha for shoving her nose in the grass during recess. Even if it was because she was being unkind to another student, it does not give me the right to use... 'force'.

And I am sorry for using... Spanish expletives toward Jared, and hitting him in the throat with his own backpack. Even if he was being rude, it does not... excuse violence. [She looks so annoyed, save her.] From this point on, I will do my best to stay in school... for the whole school day. I will try not to leave past the wall.

[She puts the paper on the desk, calmly.]

... And I will not steal the chocolate milk from the cafeteria anymore.

[More gravely:]

But if Susan insults my accent ever again, I will shove her into the trash ca—


[huh the feed ended suddenly how about that






... she's in detention now]

Comments

[specifications]

It can be for germaphobes.

[shoplifter]

What is a germaphobe?

I will bet she is a germaphobe even if I don't know it.

[specifications]

Someone who doesn't like germs and tries to keep everything neat and clean. The trash can is full of trash so you can see why that would be a bad place.

And even if she isn't, she sounds like she deserves it.

[shoplifter]

That sounds like Susan.

If she says anything again, I will flick a dirty napkin at her and see what she does.

[specifications]

Effective but drawing less attention than the trashcan dunking. Smart thinking.

[shoplifter]

I was trained to think of many scenarios.

It is just hard when trashcan dunking is more rewarding.

[specifications]

[ "Trained" huh? ]

If that's the case, you need to think of all the different scenarios you can do that won't get you into trouble. But are also satisfying.

[ aka ur smart, kid. use that noggin ]

[shoplifter]

... I guess I can make up a few.

Did you do the same, when you were younger?

privated;

[specifications]

[ He debates answering her but it sounds like she could use someone to identify with. His experience isn't the same but there's a reason he knows kids can be little shitheads. ]

Yeah, sometimes. I couldn't fight so I had figure out different ways to deal with bullies.

privated;

[shoplifter]

Strategy is good.

Especially when you are small. It is important to develop other strategies to bring down your enemy.

I like using gravity and surprise.

[specifications]

Gravity?

[shoplifter]

Yes. When you leap at someone, tie your legs, and shift your fall, it's easy to take them down onto the floor. Most people do not know how to fight if they're not on their feet.

[specifications]

[ Yeah, he's smiling some at that. Granted, there's still the question of how she knows this at all but-- ]

That's true. It also incapacitates them enough to get the upper hand.

When I was younger, I was better at being quiet and hiding. You seem to let your temper get the better of you.

[shoplifter]

I'm just not afraid of students and teachers.

That would be stupid. None of them are a threat.

... Not that I've found, anyway.

[specifications]

Pretty sure using a backpack as a weapon counts as "losing your temper".

[ Then, ]

Is this your first time in school?

[shoplifter]

Since coming here. Yes.

I learned, but not in a school. It was a facility.

[specifications]

[ "Facility". Doesn't take much to guess what that means. He sighs, long and heavy, through his nose. ]

Is that were you were trained, too?

[shoplifter]

Sí, es cierto.

They said it was for pediatric cancer studies, but that was a lie. I was born there; I did not have cancer, either.

[specifications]

¿Por cuanto tiempo?

[shoplifter]

Toda mi vida.

... You know Spanish, too?

[specifications]

[ That's depressing to read. But it continues to explain a lot. ]

Si. Conozco algunos idiomas.

Is your teacher aware of your background or do you not trust her?

[shoplifter]

[Many languages, huh?]

Have you told the people here everything about your background?

[specifications]

[ Spanish, Japanese, French, and some German and Russian. To be specific. ]

I'm not the one in school and assigned a legal guardian.

[ So no. ]

[shoplifter]

So you have not then.

[dont fuck with me i see thru you]

[specifications]

I don't have to. I'm an adult.

[ Which is the truth, young lady. ]