text; un: worstwitch

[bastardofipswich]

M4M SEEKING: NEW ARCH-ENEMY
18yo swm in search of new arch-enemy!! i took a 3 month long nap and my old one left the city with his gf :(

must be:

• male
  
• ages 17-21
  
• btwn 5'10" - 6'3"
  
• athletic
  
• able to take a beating
  
• magic OR otherwise superpowered
  
• annoyingly moral
  
• bicuriosity a plus
  

it would also help if you had an annoying group of friends i could use as leverage against you. interested parties can get in touch with Chase Collins @worstwitch!!


ps: pls include a headshot

Comments

[thestarling]

You've seen the crocodiles and such out there, right? Explode them to your heart's content.

[bastardofipswich]

......crocodiles
there are crocodiles?

i'm from new england i'm not going near any crocodiles

[thestarling]

I thought you wanted a good fight?

[bastardofipswich]

against another person! not a dinosaur that managed to beat extinction!
do i look like paul hogan to you?

[thestarling]

Oh come on, they can't be that scary. Think of it as practice.

[bastardofipswich]

crocodiles
bears
hippos

those are the three animals i'm NEVER going to fuck with

[thestarling]

That's a very specific list.

[bastardofipswich]

i like to call it a sensible one

would YOU fuck with any of those?

[thestarling]

I'm from London, mate, we don't exactly do wildlife.

[bastardofipswich]

i'm just saying
i've never SEEN any crocodiles, bears, or hippos outside of a zoo before
but i can still respect how freaky they are

[thestarling]

Pretty sure I've seen worse. Worst thing a bear can do is eat you.

[bastardofipswich]

oh yeah? what's the worst you've seen?

[thestarling]

I'm police. Do you really want to know?

[bastardofipswich]

uhhh YES??? now i'm even MORE interested

[thestarling]

Death via vagina dentata comes to mind. Or the heads exploding. Or faces falling off.

[Peter has had a very weird career.]

[bastardofipswich]

[ He just has to. STARE AT THE TEXT. for a few moments. ]

oh
okay
i'll admit
that's not what i was expecting

[thestarling]

I did warn you.

[bastardofipswich]

i honestly can't decide if i want to hear more details or live in blissful ignorance...

[thestarling]

There are worse things than wild animals, is my point.

[bastardofipswich]

yeah......
but i'm still not gonna mess with a gator