riverview | text: un scavenger.rey

I don't know what he paid for it, or if he will... [But there's always a price, isn't there?]

What's the difference between Seelies and a warlock?

How would you even check for long term side effects?

I don't know what type of medicine I need, or if I need more water...or something stronger.

Some magic users may give away spells. Magic was how Magnus earned money when I met him but he would cast spells for his friends and my family.

[Awkward... he shouldn't have mentioned Seelies when he's not sure how much Magnus wants people to know about his heritage.]

Seelies have a different genetic background than warlocks. We don't know much about them actually.

I'd have to see the packaging to know which. Something stronger usually means your headache will be worse in the morning.

I know that much. He showed off his magic during his party. You had those wings.

[And if Poe had seen those, he would've been trying to figure out how to fly with those.]

Sorry, I don't want to look at text right now. Or at my comm right now.

So Seelies have magic...that's..okay? I guess?

Alec...I was truly afraid something could've happened to Poe. He's apologized, but I still feel mad at him for it. Is that wrong?

There are others that just use their magic without payment. My friend Cat regularly heals people without payment. But that's just my world. Others may have completely different social structures.

Voice is easier for most people.

[But it's not always easier for Alec since he likes having time to consider the words he uses, especially when he's explaining the Down World to others.]

It's okay. They ones from my world not exactly friendly with me and Jace.

It's not wrong to be angry. I'd be furious if Jace did something like that even if Magnus was the one casting the spell. Too much can go wrong. It takes time to forgive people for doing reckless things even when we care about them.

It's easier right now. My headache is getting stronger and looking at my comm makes it worse.

[He doesn't have to continue explaining Down Worlders to her. She just wants to talk to someone who does share the same concerns as her.]

I accepted his apology, but I'm not ready to forgive him. He's acting like it wasn't a big deal, that nothing could've gone wrong and so many things could have. But it's his passion, and I'm trying to be supportive of it, trying to be a good friend.

[She's struggling with this, forgive her for rambling. Rey pinches the bridge of her nose and takes a deep breath.]

Honestly, am I over reacting?

Accepting an apology doesn't mean you have to forgive him right away. It takes time to get over something that hurt or scared you. [He's not sure if he's referring to Jace or his father, but Jace is an easier subject to deal with.] Being a good friend doesn't mean you can't be angry. If it did, then Jace and I would never have become parabatai.

Poe might not realize that it's a big deal. Either he doesn't realize what could have happened or he assumes that he could handle whatever the consequences were.

You're not overreacting. If Jace had done it, I'd probably tie him up and throw him in a closet until he figured out that why I was angry. [He wouldn't really but he'd daydream about it while glaring at Jace for a few days.]

[Thank you, Alec. Thank you for being the voice of reason and in her corner about this.]

He seems to think it wasn't a big deal. I tried to tell him, and...it didn't go over too well. [Read, they got into a fight and she's never gotten into a fight with a friend so...all the emotions, all the feels.]

Believe me, I was ready to go down to Taako's place, grab Poe, tie him up and throw him somewhere--and lecture him while I was doing it. But, it's his own choice and if he does it again, I can't do anything. Not that I would want to, but I...I just don't want him to get hurt.

[Rey pauses for a moment, collecting her emotions and trying not to burden Alec with her problems, or say too much. It was a fight between her and Poe, and it should just stay that way.]

[Alec rolls his eyes as he thinks of all the times Jace had tried to convince him that whatever crazy stunt he'd pulled off hadn't been dangerous.]

They rarely listen to the voice of reason, but you're right to be concerned, Rey. It usually doesn't go over well, but they still need us to keep them from doing reckless things. Or we stand by them when they do so they know someone has their back.

[That's one of the reasons that he'd become Jace's parabatai. His best friend had needed someone to be the voice of reason.]

I wonder if tying them up and leaving them for a few hours would work... [Probably not, but he's going to pretend that it might.] You can be there for him, even if you don't agree with what he's doing. That's more important than you'd think.

I'm not to abandon Poe or anything of the like. If he needs something, I will be there, no questions asked. But why try to be the voice of reason when they will do something regardless of what you say?

[How did friendship become so hard or complicated? It's a balancing act, surely.]

Probably not, probably get them upset and possibly not speak to you. [And that would cause only more trouble than anything else.]

And if that something could get him killed? Or could have gotten him killed? [Do you still support them then? But, would she be feeling this way if it was about a mission against the First Order? Yes...yes she would, but she knew he could handle himself there. Magic? Not so much.

There's a sigh with a slight catch in her voice. No, no need to let her emotions get a hold of her.]

Because sometimes we get through to them. It can make them more cautious or make them analyze the situation when they would have just jumped in without thinking.

With Jace, he was so used to being alone, he never thought of having someone worry about him or that he should care about getting hurt.

[Letting out an audible sigh, Alec rubs his chest, remembering the agony that'd he'd felt when Valentine sacrificed Jace to summon the Angel. He doesn't talk about it often, usually only with his family, but Rey won't tell anyone that would endanger Jace.]

It did get Jace killed.

The keyword there is 'sometimes.' I don't think what I did would make him think differently. I don't think it'll change anything about him, and that's not what I want at all...[Another sigh as she feels like she's going in circles...

And then everything comes to a halt.]

What do you mean it got him killed?

[Is he dead in Alec's world? Was this another reason why Alec wanted to stay here? Jyn and Cassian, she knew were dead, and probably would opt for staying here...

But to know Jace was dead or could be dead? She couldn't imagine how Alec felt at the time.]

Sometimes is better than never. [He wants to protest that it isn't changing someone, but in the end, it really is. Jace had changed because he had people in his life that cared and Alec had wanted him to change from the scared boy who didn't value his own life.]

Jace wanted to protect us, so he snuck off before a battle so that he could confront the enemy alone. It - He - [Suddenly, he realizes that he hasn't told anyone about that day in weeks. He'd lied to the Clave but when Izzy and Magnus asked after their memories had been altered, Alec had glossed over the details.] He only told one person what he was doing. I didn't know until I realized he was missing and then when he died.

It matters, Rey. Even if he doesn't listen, you'll know you tried to protect him.

[He has a point, sometimes is better than never. But at the same time, was it her place to really to tell Poe of the dangers? She wasn't his keeper, and he made it clear he was an adult. He could make his own decisions...so why bother to be the voice of reason? She was only a 'kid' after all.

Her problem seems small as she listens intently to Alec's story.]

But does that lessen the pain? The loss? [She's asking more for Alec's sake. If something had happened to Poe, even with her warning...would it have made the pain any worse than when she didn't look for him when he left the first time around? Or would it only solidify the point that maybe in her world, she was meant to be alone.

Even with her headache pounding away behind her eyes, she gains control of her emotions enough to ask:]

Do you need me to come over?

[Because you don't just say your best friend--your brother was killed and be 'okay' with it.]

I don't know. [He's thought about it. Spent nights awake, wondering how he could have saved Jace, blaming himself for the death of his parabatai, but in the end, he can't be certain if he'd feel better if he'd talked to Jace beforehand.] We may have fought and then we would have parted with anger between us. But maybe I could have helped him somehow if I had talked to him.

[He doubts it would have done any good. Recklessness was the only way to win against Sebastian, but maybe Alec could have warned Jace to be more wary of Valentine and Jace might have listened.] I'm always going to feel guilty for not doing more, even if he probably would have ignored me.

You shouldn't go out if you're not feeling well, unless you want to be away for awhile. We have room, if you need a place to calm down.

[It's hard to say what the outcome would've been if Alec had spoken to Jace. It could have resulted in both of them getting killed. It's a lot to think about, and it makes Rey wonder if that was one of the things Alec had thought about during the Harvest Festival when they were out and watching people toss their little notes into the fires.]

I would feel guilty too...and I can't imagine how that must've felt, Alec. Have you...told Jace?

[About how he feels? The guilt?]

I'm asking more for you than me. [If he needed her to be there to comfort him, instead of the opposite...though given how emotional she was feeling, and how she didn't want to be near Poe right now, maybe she should get out.] I may feel like crap, but I might head outside...to help clear my head.

We've talked about feeling guilty for not living up to our vows but I don't think he remembers dying. [When had it become normal to talk about Jace's death?] Right now, he's letting go of the past and moving forward. I don't want to ruin that for him.

I'm okay. It happened months ago. [Which really shouldn't mean it's okay but Jace is alive and he can feel him through the bond so he can handle it. Most of the time.] I talked to Magnus about it right after Jace died. He was there when the bond broke so he knows what it was like. But if you want to come over, we've probably got something that'll help the headache.

[This seems to be a reoccurring theme between Alec and Rey. Both of them talking about guilt, and how they needed to move on to keep themselves from getting sick with grief. But do either of them listen to themselves or each other? Nope.]

I don't think you would be ruining it for Jace by bringing it up, but it's a matter of when and how you do it.

[Because timing and tone make a big difference in how you deliver news to someone, or even bring up a sensitive topic.

...And does she want to go over? Yes.]

..I'll be there soon. I just..need to get away for a little bit.

Every time I mention the past, he acts like he completely failed me or that I'm going to drop dead in front of him. [Alec still doesn't know why Jace is so worried about that. He can't remember Jace ever being that panicked over losing him, not even when he was dying from the demon poison.] How do I tell him 'Your father sacrificed you to an Angel to start an apocalypse. I was stupid and left you alone and you got kidnapped and tortured while I was being a jealous brat because my boyfriend's exes."

[At least he's not trying to hide his role in the disaster Jace's life had become.]

I'll make sure that you can get into the building.

[He texts her the address while making sure that the wards will let her into the building and their apartment.]

Saying all that sounds like a good start. Possibly tying him to a chair to ensure he doesn't runaway also might help.

[She doesn't really know what Alec meant by being sacrificed to an 'Angel,' but apocalypse, that she does understand. It's what would happen if the First Order ruled the galaxy. Chaos, and more bloodshed.]

I'll be there soon.

[Rey received the address and was heading over there. It takes her a bit longer than she wanted, because of her headache, the pounding feeling behind her eyes, but she manages to find the building and shots Alec a text that she's there.]

[Alec begins to argue but since Rey is going to be there soon so he reminds her to be careful even if he knows that she will be. He makes sure that the wards will allow Rey in and tells everyone they'll have a desk. After making sure the guest room is set up, he checks one of the empty apartments, in case she'd rather be away from people if she needs a place that's away from her friends.

He's setting out painkillers, a glass of water, and one of the few muffins that lasted the morning rush when he receives her text and heads downstairs to meet her. He could buzz her in but it seems rude when she's fighting off a headache.]

I let everyone know you're here, but they'll leave you alone if you want.

[If he buzzed her in, that would've been fine with her. But, he's there, opening the gate and letting her head. Her eyes look a little puffy, possibly from crying or hard back her emotions with Poe...either way she's glad to see him, too bad it couldn't have been under different circumstances.]

Thank you. If the others want to see me, it's...it's fine.

[Who was she to tell Alec's family what to do? Either way, she follows her friend into the building, staying quiet, fighting off the headache and trying to center herself..

Fighting with one of your best friends wasn't the greatest thing around.]

text: un scavenger.rey

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