glitterpants: (( 38 karamatsu girl ))
[personal profile] glitterpants
[ Perhaps you recognize this guy because he has two other identical brothers here. Perhaps you recognize him from watching some campy soap opera that he has acted in— you know his face, he's the guy that always dies in the background. If not, perhaps you're one of the unfortunate people who actually know him.. or are friends with him. Yikes. Either way, this feed features Karamatsu illuminated by candlelight, nothing more. He's wearing a closed bathrobe and.. nothing more, either. Well, just about. There's a red bow tied around his neck— if anyone cared to look further, they'll probably see it's also draped over his collarbone, implying he's wrapped up in a ribbon like a present underneath that robe.

Spoiler: he is.

But that's not it. A painful picture deserves some painful monologues, right? He parts his lips, expression appearing wistful. It's bad acting at it's finest. It's cringe worthy. ]


Ah, December. It is probably... my second favorite time of the year. It is a time for generosity, a time for giving. A time to reflect on your former self as the year draws to an end.. a time for.. love. [ TAKES A DRAMATIC SIP OF WINE. ]
Where I am from.. we celebrate Christmas. It is.. expected, ah no, it is mandatory that love blossoms within the snowy air, shrouding all feelings of loneliness with feelings of adoration— feelings of belong. If you are lonely this month, I can offer you the greatest gift you can ever receive! Ah, are you ready? [ He sucks in a breath and then exclaims with a flourish: ]
IT IS LOVE!!!
It is all the love that I could ever give! Simply accept and be my date on the 25th! I will shower you with gifts! I will shower you with.. romance!
[ His voice is cracking slightly from sounding so desperate, tears pricking the corner of his eyes. It's really pitiful. ]

I will give you a night you won't ever forget! [ PROBABLY FOR THE WRONG REASONS... ]
Say goodbye to lonely nights, hello to season delights!!
fiercestwarrior: (salute)
[personal profile] fiercestwarrior
[ Sif is... not overly used to public speaking, unless you count rousing yells to fire soldiers up for battle, or perhaps the occasional drunken rant about something or other. Hence she looks more than a little stiff on camera, unsure how to address a crowd of unknown size that she can't even see. ]

Greetings, I am Lady Sif of Asgard.

[ Regardless of what happened to her home, that is how she will always refer to herself. ]

I am a member of the Perimeter Guard, and I am currently in need of sparring partners. Those of you who know what it means to be an asgardian will know what that says about my physique and how it might compare to your own abilities.

To those of you not familiar, suffice it to say that my people live for a long time, and I have spent most of my years training for battle. It requires a great deal of force to harm me, though blades will fare better than blunt instruments. As for my strength, it is quite considerable, though I could not say what that would mean in relative terms.

If you think yourself up to the challenge, I would be grateful if you would make yourself known.

Thank you.
talentedscavenger: (Cover)
[personal profile] talentedscavenger
If anyone has been contacted by Poe Dameron about being turned into a bird...

He is fine. He is well. For the time being. [deleted]

I'm taking care of it...

And I truly do apologize for his...excitement, for lack of a better term.

If anyone is upset, just contact me directly.


Thank you.
eusebeia: (xiv.)
[personal profile] eusebeia
[ the last time she graced the network with her presence, diana of themyscira explored the wonder of food emojis. now, however, she decides to take a more traditional approach — face-to-face, well, as much as she can over these devices. while she still prefers to meet in person, this will suffice for now. what can she say, she's old fashioned like that. ]

Thanksgiving.

[ she speaks the word softly, almost contemplative, though diana offers a bright smile into the camera. ]

Back home, we had many reasons to be thankful, and we did not limit the occasion to one day. Still, family and friends. [ her smile widens. ] That is something to celebrate.

What other — [ a careful pause, her nose wrinkling a bit. ] "holidays" are there?
deathkid: (pic#11809386)
[personal profile] deathkid

[ sitting in his room in marco's mansion with a record player belting out blitzkrieg bop. not so loud that he can't be heard, but it's clearly cranked up a little. nico, meanwhile, is sharpening his sword and looking a little put out. after having his memories shared with multiple people, he's not feeling too sociable. but he can hear jason grace in his head telling him he needs to get out of the house and talk to people. ]

Eight months. I've been here eight months and there's still no way to get back to camp. Back... home.

[ the fact he calls camp home now truly reveals just how much he misses his friends and family. ]

This place isn't too bad, but being the only demigod around here kind of sucks. I don't know how many people around here get homesick, but I would certainly accept even some of the gods, Greek gods showing up. No offense to you Norse types.

[ he picks up his sword and sets his thumb against the edge, cheering up a little as it nicks the skin, causing blood to well to the surface. sucking on his thumb, he sets the sword aside. ]

Whatever. Anyone want to go outside quarantine and kill some stuff?

ragnarsson: ([17.20] Axe time)
[personal profile] ragnarsson
[The video starts off with some cheesy infomercial music, the kind usually found on a device that will cut your hair better or replace all your kitchen devices with one. The narrator, one Jamie Dodger, accompanies a series of drawings.]

Has this ever happened to you?

[A piece of paper is held in front of the camera, showing a crude drawing of someone being violently stabbed to death. Or maybe it's a plate of spaghetti; regardless of which of them drew it, the truth is that their art skills are crap.]

Well, with the help of this eight-step training process, it won't have to. [Dodger's voice lacks every ounce of enthusiasm these infomercials are known for, which is probably why his own video back in the day had been text-only.] Just follow your instructor's guidance and one day you could look like this.

[And again, this drawing is either... someone standing over a pile of corpses, or maybe just a sack of potatoes and some of them have faces? Who knows.]

Time to meet your instructor - Phil Swift himself.

[The video pans over to Ivar, who has the usual somewhat grumpy expression on his face. It’s clear he doesn’t really get this whole idea, but he’s been talked into it. He’ll humor everyone...for now.]

Say something.

Like what?

Sell the product. [Dodger turns the music off with a frustrated huff.] We're not shooting another take.

Fine. [Ivar gives the camera only the most dramatic of all eyerolls.] You all are idiots. I don't care if you have powers, powers don't stop a knife stabbed in your throat. I will teach you to stab people before they stab you. [He looks off to the side of the camera.] Was that good?

...Sure.

[There's an awkward pause here as the boys stare each other down with silent and mutual distaste, before Dodger switches the music back on and resumes his narration.]]

With our teachings you'll be able to stab unaware enemies - [Ivar slices his axe across a dummy's back that they had set up] - slice moving targets - [Dodger throws a pillow from off-screen, and Ivar catches it with his axe and slams it down into the floor] - and even counter fireballs, all from the comfort of your broken leg throne.

[There's another long moment of silence, as Ivar slowly looks up with a cold fire in his eyes.]

And now, ladies and gentleman, for the finale, you get to see a live demonstration. [He yanks his axe back out and there’s a psychotic grin on his face.] Start running, Dodger.

[The video concludes with the device that music is coming from knocking over and warping the sound of the tune with an eerie lilt, and cuts out with a flash of sparks and a loud pop as Dodger dodges an incoming throwing axe.]

[OOC: Know that there will be a lot of threadjacking going on in this post. Dodger and he are horrible human beings.]
shoplifter: (Vegas is fucking stellar.)
[personal profile] shoplifter
[Some of you might get worried calls from Linda, Laura's tormented case worker.

The general questioning is: "HAVE YOU SEEN LAURA I HAVEN'T FOUND HER IN HOURS I'VE LOOKED EVERYWHERE."

But then, a Laura entry pops up sometime later in the day:

Her, looking curious, with the telltale signs of vegetation outside of city limits behind her.

She points the camera at the setting of the abandoned amusement park, some disappointment soon to be prevalent in her tone; she'd sneaked out and headed off to the Abandoned City or whatever people call it, mostly to get away from society and sort of marinate in her own thoughts. It's one of those months. Or many of those months. As much as she's tried adapting and appreciates her freedom, sometimes you just need to step away from it all and have your own time.

... In places Linda tells you not to ever sneak off to, of course.

Sue her, she never listens to her authority figures. She's not scared of monsters, anyway; she's already killed two getting here. It's why she's got some tar-colored blood on her sleeves and knuckles.]


We should repair this. I don't know what it is, but it looks like -- a fun place. Some of these have... strange wheels... and cars on railroads. ¿Para qué sirve? Do people who move trains practice here?

[She wanders around, her footfalls echoing in the isolated place. There's a rotted up old booth where you 'shoot' guns for prizes, but the signs are pretty overgrown with vines. She picks up a fake rifle and aims it at the blank target board beyond her, smacking on some bubblegum thoughtfully.]

Is it a place for soldiers to practice, too? It is very colorful for a soldier, but we had some color, too. They liked to put cartoons on the walls. Maybe there are cartoons on walls here, too... Maybe there are lights that make it bright. Like Vegas.

[..... Aha.

She points the camera up, up, up, toward the highest point of the ferris wheel.]


I think you see everything if you climb to the top.

[... I'mma climb to the top.]

[Feel free to have any ACTION threads as well; she's just wandering around, really, enjoying the quiet.]