video | un: iron.man

[buildsomething]

[The video opens on a very nice view of a warehouse ceiling, at least until there's a muffled curse offscreen and it tilts to reveal one Tony Stark. He's practically vibrating with the kind of manic energy that means he's been working for possibly too long, all hair standing on end and a few dark smudges on his face, but he looks pleased at least. Just behind him is a glowing blue hologram picking out the lines of something circular, spinning lazily like it was hurriedly abandoned.]

So hey, you all know those power plants out there in yonder abandoned wasteland? Sure you do. I know there's one working, but I've got some ideas for how to give the other ones a good kick. Thing is, I could use an extra hand.

[The metal arm that's been slowly rolling along behind him suddenly straightens and twists in Tony's direction, claw at the front contracting. Without looking back, Tony just snorts.] Not you. [The arm droops, somehow giving the impression of looking disappointed, but continues his trek to wherever he thinks he's going.]

Anyway, yes. Manpower needed. Preferably the kind that knows it's way around a welding iron, but I'll take what I can get. Oh, and a metric shitload of palladium. So if anybody's got a spare catalytic converter or twenty, let me know.

[He reaches for the phone, then pauses, something slightly sardonic flicking across his mouth.]

Or if one of you magic types wants to straw-into-gold me up some, I'll take that too.

Thanks in advance.

[Looking much more satisfied, he reaches the rest of the way to cut the feed.]

Comments

video; @falcon

[wingedman]

Have you actually slept lately?

[He's going to get you some nap incense and hold you down.]

[buildsomething]

What? I'm working.

[So probably not, no.]

[wingedman]

[There's just a sigh.]

How long till you can get to a stopping point?

[Meaning, yes, he is going to come over and make you eat and take a nap.]

[buildsomething]

Uhm? Mostly I'm just waiting to see if I can get the materials I need.

[He looks a little like he's not sure why the question is being asked.]

[wingedman]

Okay, I'm gonna come over in a little bit.

[Watch out, Tony, you're going to be mother henned.]

[buildsomething]

[He knows that tone at least. It earns Sam a look.]

I don't need to be fed and watered, thanks.

[wingedman]

Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of this lasagna.

[Sam pans the camera over a dish of pasta. It does, in fact, look delicious.]

[buildsomething]

[...okay, that's a pretty good argument. Tony eyes it for a moment, then sighs, sounding as put-upon as possible.]

Okay fine, you can come over. You can keep Dum-E company.

[wingedman]

Great, I'll read him a book or something.

You have any small components that need sorting? I have way too many bored mice on my hands.

[buildsomething]

I...probably? I mean, sorting is always helpful.

[wingedman]

Great. They love being helpful, you'll see.

[About fifteen minutes later, Sam shows up with lasagna, mice, and, although he hasn't taken it out of the inside pocket of his jacket yet, some of the grey-purple nap incense.]

Here. [He hands Tony the container of lasagna.] You'll need to nuke it a bit, it's too damn cold outside.

[buildsomething]

[Tony gives him a dry look, but just rolls his eyes and heads towards the microwave.]

Are you planning on leaving the mice here or are they on loan?

[He's honestly not sure which one he'd prefer.]

[wingedman]

Don't worry, they used to help out your double in the lab. He established some kind of Science Rules for them.

[Hail the Rules of Science! cheer the mice in a tiny chorus. They sound excited at getting to do something, and Sam sets them down on a worktable.]

I have, like, fifty of them; I need to establish some splinter colonies before it gets out of hand. Either that, or they need to do something to pay rent.

[buildsomething]

[There's a pause before Tony's expression shifts into mild horror.]

You didn't bring all fifty, did you?

[wingedman]

Nah, just these guys.

[Sam gestures to the three on the table, who erupt into more spontaneous cheering.]

I don't even know how I'd move them all. Although they're pretty good at using the roombas to get around.

[buildsomething]

That is...something I'd probably pay to see.

[There's something a little resigned about the admission, but Tony can't help watching as the little guys start scurrying curiously around the worktable. They are pretty cute.]

Alright, fine. They can stay, as long as they don't trip Dum-E or anything.

[wingedman]

[Hail the Three-Faced Priest! Hail the First Invention!

(Look, the mice like hailing. Not that there's a reason why Sam wants to get rid of a few or anything.)]

You can come over for the races sometime. They like to use the upstairs hallway as a track.

[buildsomething]

[Tony can't quite fight a little huff of a laugh as Dum-E himself wanders over to meet the new guests. The claw bends nearly all the way to the tabletop as robot and mice inspect each other.]

Races, seriously?

[wingedman]

Yeah, I'm....not really sure how those work. But I got a couple of the souped-up robots from the other Tony before he left.

I think they tape knives to them sometimes, too.

[But not his good kitchen knives. Those are off-limits.

The mice stretch up to the claw, touching it with reverence - and then they start to climb on it, swarming up the claw and onto the long arm.]

[buildsomething]

[Dum-E straightens slowly with almost exaggerated care not to disturb his new passengers and very happily begins rolling off towards the back of the lab. Giving a tour? Who knows. JARVIS will keep him in line, Tony's not too concerned.]

What, like the thing with tying knives and balloons to roombas and having them deathmatch?

[Not that he's ever tried such a thing. Of course not. Especially not with Rhodey and copious amounts of alcohol.]

[wingedman]

Honestly? I have no idea.

[But the mice hear it, so thanks for giving them ideas, Tony. They cheer excitedly as Dum-E rolls off. New best friends.]

C'mon, less chit-chat about the mice, more eating my goddamn delicious lasagna.

[Nudging Tony back in the direction of the microwave now. It's like having an insistent sheepdog around.]

[buildsomething]

Yeah, yeah. It's cooking, relax. Even I don't supercharge microwaves.

[Not here, anyway. But he lets himself be herded over in that direction without too much resistance.]

Hope you brought plates and things.

[wingedman]

[Sam just digs a fork out of his pocket and holds it up.]

I already ate.

[buildsomething]

[Tony pauses in reaching for the microwave and turns to grace Sam with a look.]

I am not eating that whole thing myself.

[wingedman]

You got a fridge, don't you?

[Yeah, that's right, you have enough for leftovers. And who doesn't love leftover lasagna?]