|| video | @ciscodelamancha | feb 10 ||

[franciscoramon]

[ The video starts off shaky, clearly taken using the front-facing camera on a phone being wielded by a deeply intoxicated Cisco Ramon. He is pink-cheeked and bright-eyed and giggling so much he has difficulty speaking. ]

Heyooo Quarantine! Sup! Guess what?! It's my birthday today! That means I'm twenty fuckin' five, which means I'm totally old, and wise, and stuff. So I thought it'd be fun if y'all sent me, like, questions! For advice! You know, like Dear Abby, only instead it's Dear Cisco. I've been around a whole quarter of a century now so you best believe I've got plenty of knowledge I can drop on ya like that!

[ He lifts the hand not holding the phone, clearly meaning to snap, but realizes belatedly he's still holding a glass. He turns away from the screen, muttering a quick Babe, babe hold this for me- before handing off the drink to someone outside the shot. Then he looks at the camera once more and snaps, not loudly enough to be heard and late enough that it is unintentionally very comical. ]

It's cool if you send them anonymous or not, anything goes. Lemme help you make some good-ass choices in your life! Or if you're not feeling the advice game you could just like do some shout outs and holler at your loved ones.

Comments

[somnioergosum]

i don't even know where to begin

[But he's going to try.]

dear cisco

[franciscoramon]

yes?
wait are you addressing me or is that a reason

[somnioergosum]

a reason
put down your phone or whatever you're using before you start calling yourself mr manners

[franciscoramon]

mr manners is good, dig the alliteration
but i'm not jst offering etiquette tips
i'm offering the big w
WISDOM

[ He is going to be so very embarrassed... ]

[somnioergosum]

[He can't. He just can't. For a solid minute he has his head in his hands before he finally responds.]

the only thing you're offering is second hand embarrassment
i'm cringing so hard i'm getting a migraine

[franciscoramon]

wow well i'm sorry to hear you hate fun!!!

don't give yourself a headche reading stuff
just walk away
that's a piece of advice from
the one and only Dear Cisco

[somnioergosum]

you know what i got another question

how do you keep your friend from acting like a total loser?

[Actually relevant to many other relationships, including the one he has with himself.]

[franciscoramon]

[ Obviously, he knows Ronan's talking about him, but his takeaway is not being called a total loser so much as... ]

wait does this mean we're friends?
like officially?

[somnioergosum]

[Wait-- shit. Why does he have to say things he means without knowing he means them?]

hey i never said that
official friends don't exist. you're a friend or you're not

[Oh, no. That's not helping. God.]

all the drinking is making you read into things.

[Good job, Ronan. That'll totally work.]

[franciscoramon]

[ Ronan has been well and truly snared, incriminated by his own words, and now the degree of his backpedaling is only confirming the matter. Which delights Cisco. But he decides to let it go with a mere: ]

sure thing

[ Ronan's not fooling him one bit. ]

ok my advice is:
nobodys a bigger loser than a dude who spends to much time worrying other people think
so don't worry about your friends
let them live their truth!!!
don't let anybody else say shit about it!1
and then just tease the shit out of them later cuz taht's what friends are for

[somnioergosum]

[This is why he never texts.]

it's your funeral
just remember you literally asked for it.

[franciscoramon]

🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉