video; username: spiderman

[madeupnames]

[Ah, look there! It's Spider-Man! He's filming... sideways? Oh, wait, he's standing on a brick wall sideways. That explains it.

His eyes are squinty and peeved, and his arms are crossed — who needs to hold the phone for recording when you've got webs to do that?

Anyway. He's peeved.]

Uuum, just FYI? Graffiti is 100% not cool. I mean, some of it is cool if you get a permit or you're actually any good at drawing —

Point is, don't gross up someone's wall with your bad artwork or some signature a bank teller wouldn't even take.

Also, how dare you use my creepy disfigured twin against me.

[What? Oh, look, he's turning the camera to show — oh dear god.]



[OH DEAR GOOOOOOD]

... I gotta say, The Arachnid really let himself go. And lost his neck in a tragic head-on collision with a building. Yikes.

And the Hulk should probably hit a dentist ASAP, but I'm loving what he's doing with the half-cut shirt.

Really brings out his... green... everything. 

[He rubs his chin.]

... You know, I'm just assuming that's the Hulk, but for all I know the guy who did it didn't have skin tones. Maybe he's just angry and sick.

Comments

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[wiccant]

Like, saying I want it to disappear, or be covered with something more amazing, and making it happen.

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[madeupnames]

So like you're the whiteboard eraser.

[:) He sounds so content about this.]

I think we'd have to check with the building owner, but that would be cool! Like a mural-type thing, or anything that's not, uh. A scary misshapen Spider-Man.

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[wiccant]

Could do an Avengers mural, depending on what they say. Replace the Hulk and yours with something a little more. . realistic.

( he has no problem cleaning up messes. )

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[madeupnames]

[He is totally not gonna blush under his mask at the thought of being part of an Avengers mural.]

... I mean, technically I'm not an Avenger. Yet. Personal preference.

[Until he's in space, fighting a genocidal maniac who kills a lot of people.

He's... trying not to think of that, though.]

But if the building manager is cool with it, the Avengers are a great mural choice.

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[wiccant]

Let me know either way?

Because I definitely don't want to see that monstrosity when I'm walking around downtown.

( like at least make an attempt, weird graffiti artists. )

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[madeupnames]

You and me both. I'm flattered someone thought of me, but also, I look like someone aired me up with a tire pump.

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[wiccant]

He doesn't even have your abs. And his arms are different lengths.

( maybe this dude should learn to paint better before going after walls. )

Have you seen the Spiderman action figures? The good ones?

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[madeupnames]

....... There are good ones?

[Bless his young soul.]

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[wiccant]

Of course there are.

I can pull out a few, if you want to see them.

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[madeupnames]

[A hand goes over his heart, and he stumbles dramatically against the wall.]

You have some?!

Of course I wanna see!

[He's gonna die. All these dramatic conversations about getting a second chance at living here, and he's gonna just die here and now.]

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[wiccant]

I have a shelf full of figures in my apartment.

( because he's a nerd, don't question him. also: most of them were gifts. )

You're welcome to come by whenever.

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[madeupnames]

[Oh my goooood.]

That is one of the best things I've ever heard in my life.

Thank you, you wonderful nerdy hero, you. I've love to see them. I bet they look cooler than me.

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[wiccant]

( you're also a nerd, nerd. )

Yeah, of course. I'll send you the address in a private message. There's a balcony you can land on, if you prefer.

( ain't nobody here has time for stairs. )

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[madeupnames]

Cool! Balcony it is!

[You know him too well! But also, he should probably be... careful... as far as he's aware, Billy isn't aware of the whole 'I'm Peter' side of the coin. It's so annoying, sometimes, balancing two identities.

SEND ME THE LOCATION I MUST SEE THESE ACTION FIGURES

(Spider-Man is a huge dweeb pass it on.)]

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[wiccant]

( the location is sent via private text--a street address, apartment number, description of the correct balcony, all that. )

Whenever you're free.

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[madeupnames]

I'm an American, I'm always free!

... I mean, 10% of the time, when I'm not panicking over money or questioning my education or worrying about criminal activity. [A pause.] I'll be there in a jiff!

[ZIP ZOOM LET'S GET TO THIS ROOM

... He might knock on a window, maybe, just don't question the upside down superhero.]

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[wiccant]

( the joke earns peter a laugh, before he's waving him off. )

I'll see you when you get here.

( aand letting the video feed disconnect. the windows are already unlocked (ain't nobody breaking into the apartment of a speedster, the future demiurge, and a space king) and when peter knocks on the window, billy's quick to get up off of the couch, pushing it open enough for him to get through. )

Hey! Welcome.

[madeupnames]

[He comes crawling in and stands up on the ceiling, as is his want.]

Why thank you! Lovely little place you got here. Surprised it's not a glowy magical realm full of life's greatest mysteries. But this is way better. Much more homely.

[Spider-Man is just gonna walk in a big upside-down circle, hands on hips.]

[wiccant]

( it's a nice little apartment. one door has a sign that reads "speak friend and enter", the other is plainish, but there is a pile of clothes stacked right next to the entranceway: socks, tshirts, things that people generally take off before they get to their room.

the tv area has stacks of consoles under the flatscreen, and shelves close by of figures of various avengers. there's one spiderman figure, placed near the iron man. )

Thanks. We have the Sanctum for all of our magic-y needs. Tommy and Teddy are a lot less into it than I am.

[madeupnames]

[Oh yeah, this place is way nicer than his new place. Note to self, make even better friends with Billy and company.]

Oh, yeah! I've met them. They're cool dudes.

[Teddy and Tommy, that is. When he eyes the Spider-Man figurine, he audibly gasps like the dork he is.]

It's so cool looking! Can I pick it up and look at it?

[wiccant]

Yeah, you can pick it up. He has magnets on his feet that keep him attached to the base, so just press a hand down against it to pull him off.

( it's plastic, so it's not as if he's too concerned with peter breaking it. and even if he did drop it and pieces fell off, billy has the skillset to fix it. ) Just don't throw him out the window,he doesn't have webs to catch himself.

[madeupnames]

[He picks it up quickly, but with care, and just stares at it for a moment.]

I saw one of these in a shop — only it was, y'know. A bootleg you'd see memes about.

This is so cool. Whoa.

[Careful, Spider-Man, your Parker is showing.]

[wiccant]

I made that one myself. Uh, with magic. But a lot of these were birthday gifts.

( yeah, riverview isn't going to offer copyrighted shit probably, but it's fine. billy's nerd enough to make it himself. )

If you want some, I can get you a few too.

[madeupnames]

[He whirls around and sounds incredibly soft and flattered, t b q h.]

You'd do that?

Man, I wouldn't wanna ask something like that for free, though.

There's gotta be something I'd give you in return.

[wiccant]

( what a cute kid. he definitely likes this peter, this spiderman. he's cool, earnest. )

Can I borrow one of your web shooters for a little bit? Like an hour? Could that be my something?

( like listen, those things seem fun. and it's not as if he really needs something in return. )