text; @fromTV☂

[spellslots]

What's up, chucklefucks, it's me, Taako, everybody's favorite wizard here to beg, desperately, for you to entertain me for next eight fucking hours while I mess with this spell.

["This spell" being his transmutation stone that he needs to remake, but it takes eight hours to prepare and honestly, he's going to go crazy.]

I'll even help you out here but giving you a starting point or several, cause I'm just amazing like that.

First off, give ch'boy some movies to watch or music to listen to. Don't bother recommending Beyoncé I'm all over that already. I can't imagine any of you being interesting enough to keep me amused for eight hours so like, this is my back up plan.

The main plan is let's play a fucking game, I was gonna go with truth or dare but it's hard to police that shit on the network so we're doing two truths and a lie instead.

Ready?

1. I've been a professor
2. I turned a dude into a cat for cheating on me and never turned him back
3. One time I fucked up a spell and everything I drank tasted like key lime gogurt for six months

[[ooc: feel free to threadjack on this one if it gets interesting]]

Comments

[nostalgiabomb]

I think it's a very specific type of person that's an actual a fan of tentacles.

1/2

[spellslots]

My future boyfriend, apparently.

[spellslots]

That's apparently on the boyfriend part, I know for sure that he's into tentacles

[nostalgiabomb]

This the same guy who may or may not be a cat?

Schrodinger's boyfriend?

[spellslots]

What's a schrodinger?

[nostalgiabomb]

... you know what I'm actually not sure.

Best guess is that he was some guy who wasn't a huge fan of cats.

[spellslots]

That's pretty understandable.

Anyway the cat one was the lie, I don't get cheated on.

[nostalgiabomb]

[ Peter scrolls back up to look at the list again. Then, ]

What's gogurt?

[spellslots]

Portable yogurt

[A very unhelpful answer, but also the truth.]

[nostalgiabomb]

I mean, yogurt already comes in little cups, doesn't it?

what's more portable than that

[spellslots]

A tube so you don't gotta fuck around with a spoon

[nostalgiabomb]

... huh. So like an Otter Pop. But yogurt.

[ A second or two as Peter considers this modern marvel. ]

Gross.

Mind if I ask what spell you screwed up?

[spellslots]

You can ask, for sure, but my answer isn't gonna all that interesting, I was just fucking around with transmutation magic.

[nostalgiabomb]

Okay, to be fair, any answer you give about magic is gonna be seriously rad, just by virtue of the fact that I've never seen anyone legitimately do magic.

I'm gonna hazard a guess that transmutation is turning one thing into another?

[spellslots]

Got it in one!

And I'm legitimately doing magic right the fuck now, it's just boring magic. I'm turning a rock into a magic rock.

[nostalgiabomb]

... like. are you adding googly eyes?

Because lemme tell you, Pet Rocks were already a thing back in the 70s, so you're getting to that craze a little late.

[spellslots]

Well I wasn't gonna but now I fucking am.

Anyway nah dude it's like a healing stone?
Takes eight hours to make but then I can use it to resurrect someone or cure them of shit.

[nostalgiabomb]

you can resurrect someone?

[spellslots]

If they're freshly dead, yep!

[nostalgiabomb]

Ah.

[ Good thing this is text – it can't betray how slightly disappointed he is by that bit of news. ]

What kinda time frame is it? Like, within the hour or your resurrection's free?

[spellslots]

10 days and I've gotta have the body, I can't just summon some thug to me and make them alive again, you know? But ideally the sooner the better cause there's less chance of a reaper getting involved.

[nostalgiabomb]

like a metaphorical reaper or the grim variety

[spellslots]

Grim, not that he's as spooky scary as he pretends to be

But I guess there's different ones depending on the reality, maybe some of them are actually scary and not just handsome

[nostalgiabomb]

I mean, I met someone who literally called herself Death, a little while ago. And she was, like, actually super nice?

Like, creepy, kinda, but the kinda low-key creepy you get when you stare at an old doll for too long

[spellslots]

Oh, yeah she's great! More of like the actual death than Kravitz is, he just works for the Raven Queen and death & life is her domain