trashvalkyrie: (44)
V A L K Y R I E ([personal profile] trashvalkyrie) wrote in [community profile] riverview2017-12-27 10:58 am

video || un: scrapper142

[This broadcast comes to you LIVE from outside a fancy lingerie shop, where Val and Sif are standing, both looking perplexed and a little...grumpy?

The shop employee wouldn’t let them film inside, so Val’s begrudgingly bought a few of the more offensive items on offer, purely for the purpose of figuring out what the fuck is wrong with people, y’all need Odin.

Nodding to Sif, she holds up a pair of lacy thong underwear. Her phone is propped up on a public mailbox so she can do this handsfree, waggling the offending garment in front of the camera.]


Right. What MAN decided this was a good idea? The whole point of underwear is to keep everything covered. This—this is a torture device.

And it gets worse. Sif? Show them the other thing.

[ Sif appears reluctant to even be touching the thing in her hand, but in the interest of getting some answers she is going to make the sacrifice. It’s another pair of panties, of course, this time with a zipper down the front. Said zipper gets opened, and Sif spreads the resulting hole out to really show it off to the camera.]

Is this supposed to be appealing? To anyone? These things barely exist to begin with, surely ease of access was never a problem big enough to warrant such a thing.

[Val nods emphatically.]

Fucking exactly. You guys had one job and you botched it. Not to mention— ‘push-up bras’? Why would I want to choke on my own tits? It’s completely unnecessary. If any of you have an explanation, please tell us. We want to have a good laugh about it.

[Sif simply nods at that, Val pretty much summed it all up right there.]

[personal profile] thesavior 2017-12-27 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Emma can't help but grin at that because the image of Snow White and Prince Charming discussing crotchless panties is now burned into her brain. ]

Yeah, I would too. I guess I don't get the need to impress your companion, you know?

[personal profile] thesavior 2017-12-28 12:19 am (UTC)(link)
[ Emma laughs softly, nodding her head in total agreement.]

You tell 'em. I never really saw the appeal of turning myself into something I'm not just for the sake of a guy.

[personal profile] thesavior 2017-12-29 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
Agreed. I do have to tell you that there are guys and girls out there that won't give a crap about things like that.

[ Her thoughts drift briefly to Killian before refocusing on Val. ]

[personal profile] thesavior 2017-12-30 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Oh come on, you have to be good at spotting the good ones right?

[personal profile] thesavior 2018-01-01 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh believe me, me too. Maybe we can learn together?

[personal profile] thesavior 2018-01-03 11:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I.... I don't cruise. So no, not that. I just meant there are things about this place that I don't know.