video || un: scrapper142

[trashvalkyrie]

[This broadcast comes to you LIVE from outside a fancy lingerie shop, where Val and Sif are standing, both looking perplexed and a little...grumpy?

The shop employee wouldn’t let them film inside, so Val’s begrudgingly bought a few of the more offensive items on offer, purely for the purpose of figuring out what the fuck is wrong with people, y’all need Odin.

Nodding to Sif, she holds up a pair of lacy thong underwear. Her phone is propped up on a public mailbox so she can do this handsfree, waggling the offending garment in front of the camera.]

Right. What MAN decided this was a good idea? The whole point of underwear is to keep everything covered. This—this is a torture device.

And it gets worse. Sif? Show them the other thing.

[ Sif appears reluctant to even be touching the thing in her hand, but in the interest of getting some answers she is going to make the sacrifice. It’s another pair of panties, of course, this time with a zipper down the front. Said zipper gets opened, and Sif spreads the resulting hole out to really show it off to the camera.]

Is this supposed to be appealing? To anyone? These things barely exist to begin with, surely ease of access was never a problem big enough to warrant such a thing.

[Val nods emphatically.]

Fucking exactly. You guys had one job and you botched it. Not to mention— ‘push-up bras’? Why would I want to choke on my own tits? It’s completely unnecessary. If any of you have an explanation, please tell us. We want to have a good laugh about it.

[Sif simply nods at that, Val pretty much summed it all up right there.]

Comments

voice; thunderer

[worldsaway]

I'm glad you're both keeping busy.

voice; sif

[fiercestwarrior]

I think one could say that we are... what is that word... "bonding"?

[worldsaway]

I can't think of anything better to bond over. I often take new friends to lingerie stores.

[fiercestwarrior]

I am sure you look quite fetching in tiny bits of lace.

[worldsaway]

I look fetching in most things. [Said with absolutely no doubt.]

Practicality has nothing to do with lingerie. It's not as if you'd be wearing it on a battlefield. Although some would say you consider a bedroom a battlefield...

[fiercestwarrior]

[ Sif can't disagree. ]

If these people claim to have first-hand knowledge, you have been very misled.

[ She hasn't had any company in her bedroom for a very long time, nor has she wanted it (until she came to the quarantine, that is...). Still, her pride demands that she point something else out: ]

Besides, some people like that.

[worldsaway]

I never said they didn't. Some people like a challenge. Ragnar, for example.. [He doesn't know, but he's seen enough to consider it.]

[fiercestwarrior]

Ragnar likes a lot of things. Should you and Bryn ever desire company I am sure he would be delighted to show you.

[worldsaway]

He seems more of the opinion that you should keep Bryn and I company. [Thor thinks she'll find that funny.]

We probably should have scared a little more reverence into him.

[fiercestwarrior]

He does what?

[ Nope, not funny. ]

In my experience attempts at intimidation only make him... excited.

[worldsaway]

[Whoops, she's not happy. Better fix that.]

I wonder how he would take to being electrocuted.

[fiercestwarrior]

Now there is a thought.

[worldsaway]

If he's being a pest, I can always give him a little zap, you know. [Thor shrugs, as if he needs permission.]

I already told him that you aren't a woman to be trifled with.

voice; scrapper142

[trashvalkyrie]

Really don't know what else you expected out of me. You said to do whatever I want.

[worldsaway]

I expect nothing, so I'm still impressed by what you come up with.

[trashvalkyrie]

That's the highest praise I've gotten in a very long time, actually, thanks!

[worldsaway]

I knew you had low standards, but that's actually pretty sad. [Anyway.]

I'm glad you finally made friends with someone with some sense.

[trashvalkyrie]

I didn't realize you didn't know how to interpret sarcasm, either.

[She cackles.]

I had to, after making friends with you and your brother.

[worldsaway]

Don't think for a second that I ever thought you were sincere. [Thor shakes his head, then shrugs.]

Very sad when the Hulk is the voice of reason among us. Did you meet at Yule?

[trashvalkyrie]

Good, I'm glad you know what you're dealing with by now.

[She snorts.] No, we met at the....festival. Higgle. Whatever it was called.

[worldsaway]

Hygge. [Thor corrects, with a snort.]

Interesting that you're shopping and not trying to beat one another to death.

[trashvalkyrie]

Whatever.

[SAME DIFF]

Why would I beat her to death? She didn't drag me away from my life of leisure and boozing.

[worldsaway]

You're right back to that kind of life, you have nothing to complain about. [Gruffly.]

It's normally what she does with friends.

[trashvalkyrie]

Don't tell me what I can and cannot complain about.

[It's a cherished right of hers!!]

Well, I guess she must like me better, then!

[worldsaway]

Don't tell me what I can and cannot tell you.

[It's also a cherished right of his.]

Was she drunk when she met you?