video || un: scrapper142

[trashvalkyrie]

[This broadcast comes to you LIVE from outside a fancy lingerie shop, where Val and Sif are standing, both looking perplexed and a little...grumpy?

The shop employee wouldn’t let them film inside, so Val’s begrudgingly bought a few of the more offensive items on offer, purely for the purpose of figuring out what the fuck is wrong with people, y’all need Odin.

Nodding to Sif, she holds up a pair of lacy thong underwear. Her phone is propped up on a public mailbox so she can do this handsfree, waggling the offending garment in front of the camera.]

Right. What MAN decided this was a good idea? The whole point of underwear is to keep everything covered. This—this is a torture device.

And it gets worse. Sif? Show them the other thing.

[ Sif appears reluctant to even be touching the thing in her hand, but in the interest of getting some answers she is going to make the sacrifice. It’s another pair of panties, of course, this time with a zipper down the front. Said zipper gets opened, and Sif spreads the resulting hole out to really show it off to the camera.]

Is this supposed to be appealing? To anyone? These things barely exist to begin with, surely ease of access was never a problem big enough to warrant such a thing.

[Val nods emphatically.]

Fucking exactly. You guys had one job and you botched it. Not to mention— ‘push-up bras’? Why would I want to choke on my own tits? It’s completely unnecessary. If any of you have an explanation, please tell us. We want to have a good laugh about it.

[Sif simply nods at that, Val pretty much summed it all up right there.]

Comments

[scholiast]

(Lucretia knows she would have found this funny a couple months ago, but living in the Quarantine has dulled her ability to be surprised any more.)

Yes.

... Was it unwelcome?

[fiercestwarrior]

Not at all, if I do not wish to hear what people have to say I do not invite them to speak.

I am merely unfamiliar with many turns of phrase that are used in this realm.

[scholiast]

Fair enough.

Have you been enjoying exploring this realms many wonders?

[fiercestwarrior]

Not particularly.

[ Some parts have been fun, but most of her time in the quarantine has been pretty disheartening. ]

[scholiast]

(aw no she was trying to joke about the lingerie again.)

Oh, I'm sorry. It has been pretty touch and go here lately.

[fiercestwarrior]

[ Sorry Lucretia, Sif takes things a bit literally sometimes. ]

Yes. I expect I will get used to it.

[scholiast]

(She really should be used to this from Asgardians; she knows Thor.)

Are you quite keen to return home?

[fiercestwarrior]

It will not be much better, but yes.

[scholiast]

I gather this has something to do with the current fate of Asgard?
I was sorry to hear of it.

[fiercestwarrior]

Asgard will rise again.

[ She has to believe that. ]

[scholiast]

I think so, too. I only know a handful of Asgardians, but you've all been so full of vim and vigor. I don't doubt you'll rebuild together.

[fiercestwarrior]

Which of us do you know?

[scholiast]

Uhhh Thor, Loki, Val, Kara... Angela, too.

(heaps!)