@det.prettyboy; text

[causational]

Hey everyone! I don't post on here super often, but I've been laid up for a week now and I'm going a little crazy. Total cabin fever.

I used to see forums like this on the internet back home, and I thought it might be kind of fun here too, so I thought I'd give it a try, because reading those forums was always a lot of fun.

So, Crowd-Sourced Relationship Advice!

I turned on anonymous posting on here, so you can make a fake username and submit a description of a problem that you're having in your relationships, either romantic or at work or whatever, and other anonymous people can give you advice!

Or you can stay logged in on your real account. Up to you!

Comments

<anon @romantichopeless> ideal proposal?

[causational]

I want to propose sometime soon and I want it to be perfect.

What's your ideal proposal? Nothing is too ridiculous.

<anon>

[tanker]

never proposed myself but
tailor it to them
like, if they're shy, don't go for a proposal in public
if they're romantic, go all out with the location and the candles and flowers and all that
doesn't matter if it makes obvious

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

You've definitely got a point about making it suit the person. I have a few ideas about that, I'm just worried about them finding out beforehand and ruining everything!

[tanker]

can you plan it outside of your shared living space? hide whatever you're planning under work plans, or hanging out with a friend, or something like that. keep the ring at someone else's place, someone you trust

<anon>

[bastardofipswich]

don't listen to other anon
make it a big spectacle NO MATTER WHAT
GO BIG OR GO HOME SINGLE
also if you can ride in on a unicorn even better
i'm sure you can find one here

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

That would definitely make it memorable. Want to help me find a unicorn?

[bastardofipswich]

are you kidding?
YES!!!

<anon>

[jolting]

You might want to be prepared for the imperfect
And be okay with it
Honestly, it makes a better memory

The important thing is make it personal
And don't do that stupid thing where you hide the ring in food or a drink
Unless you want to perform the Heimlich

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

That's really practical, I just hate thinking of it not being perfect. The person I'm proposing to is perfect, I want the proposal to be just as great!

Yeah I definitely wasn't going to do that. I always thought that was kind of lame and cliché anyway.

[jolting]

I'm going to assume you mean they're perfect in your eyes and not in reality

<anon>

[bringbackgold]

Mine did not go as planned, but it worked.

Imperfect worked. But if you're set on perfect, have back-up plans.

But I found that personal was best.

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

Yeah? If it won't out you, what went wrong? I wouldn't mind preparing myself for the worst haha.

A lot of people have said personal. Do you mean private or tailored to the person?

anon

[bringbackgold]

I don't know if it matters if it does, anyway.

Irregular sleeping patterns and a cat ruined it.

Both, personally. Unless whoever you're proposing to is a showy person.

<anon>

[flowlikewater]

I have heard that when one proposes, the other party should ideally not be entirely *surprised" by it.

But I wish you luck. I have never proposed myself, but I am with someone I am very serious about... and you've made me ponder some things.

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

Well, I don't think they would be entirely surprised, we've talked about wanting to be together forever. Made plans. You know?

Thank you.

Are you thinking of proposing? Have you been together for long?

<anon>

[flowlikewater]

Then I am sure you will have no problems. After all, you know your loved one and what they would like at the end of the day.

I have known them a while but we haven't been together very long in the scheme of things. I do not think it would be appropriate yet. But in the future... I think it is a possibility.

<anon>

[inebriety]

I proposed by hiring out the people from her hometown to spell out the words 'will you marry me?' while I took her on a flight over there.

I think it helped mentioning how much money I spent paying that many people to stand around for hours.

<anon>

[causational]

You really think that she said yes because of the money?

@b.crusher because who needs anon

[dancingmd]

My husband proposed to me by sending me a book while I was at medical school called "How to Advance Your Career Through Marriage."

Not everyone's cup of tea, of course, but it suited us and our sense of humor as a couple. You know your partner best, their likes and dislikes - an ideal proposal is one that will be one personal to the both of you.

<anon @romantichopeless; 1/2>

[causational]

[Oh. It's Beverly. For a moment, he's tempted to come off anon and ask for her advice directly. But he's going to take a moment to consider it.]

That's...actually really cute. And yeah that makes a lot of sense. About a personal proposal.

@det.prettyboy; text; PRIVATE; 2/2

[causational]

Hey Beverly.

Please don't tell him. And I know we haven't talked much. But I'd really like to have someone to chat with about this.

<anon>

[franciscoramon]

[ He doesn't evEN KNOW. ]

i think a mistake people make is they worry too much about the setting or the gimmick
and don't spend enough time thinking about what they're actually gonna say
just 'marry me' isn't nearly as good as being able to tell them how much they mean to you
that's more important than a flash mob or sky writing

good luck bud!

<anon @romantichopeless>

[causational]

Yeah? You know, that really makes sense. Thankfully I'm the type of person who likes to think about these things in advance.

I definitely have a lot of things to say about my feelings for this person. I could go on and on, I think my biggest problem would be shutting up long enough for them to get a word in, whether it's yes or no.

<anon>

[smokedout]

just get down on one knee after dinner like a fucking adult
theatrics are just gonna give her something else to judge you for.

<anon>

[causational]

I didn't say I wanted theatrics. Perfect means different things to different people and I was just curious what people's 'perfect' meant.

I also didn't say it was a her.