Peter Parker (
madeupnames) wrote in
riverview2018-09-19 12:25 am
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
video. un: p.parker | don't drink and vlog, people
WOOOOOO—
[THUMP, CLATTER, A CURSE WORD THAT STARTS WITH 'MOTHER' THAT COMES FROM A POLITE LITTLE VOICE.]
Wheeew — Helloooo Riverview!
[There's a shuffling of feet as the familiar voice carries further away, like he's walking away from the feed. Someone calls distantly: 'Enjoy your glory years, kid!']
Thank you, sir! Where's the tram...? Which street again — Oh! I dropped my — [Dropped his phone. Oops. Right! He picks it up, squinting into the feed; Peter looks — well, drunk. He's very drunk. He whispers a little lower:] Hey, sorry, oops — sorry, it's late and I'm kinda noisy. I'll shut up. Shhhh.
[He staggers sideways in his attempt to sneak quietly, so there's that.]
Guys, I was, like, so worried about drinking? But I feel great! Mr. Wilson, thanks for helping me loosen up a little; I dunno why I was even nervous. I even did the karaoke thing on my own. Like, the thing on my bucket list? Man... It was so fun... I don't think I had that much fun in... I don't even know when. Heh. I love you guys. [He whispers in a giggle to himself, looking around and ignoring the feed for a moment:] I have noooo idea where I'm at... Oh, wait! that's Centerfield Lane, I'm doing great...!
But where's the tram again? Shit. Iiii mean 'crap'. Crap is what I meant.
Uuuuh. Hold on. [The feed blacks out again, and there's the telltale sounds of someone clearly climbing up a fire escape toward someone's roof. He's very coordinated for a drunk teenager.] There we go! I seeeee it now. Cool, awesome. Cool.
[He looks at the feed again, the background higher up.]
So I was thinking! I've been spending soooo much time moping about stuff I can't, uuuuh. Do anything about, so I was figuring... why not relax a little? I got this To Do List thing I wanna get done, and I was wondering if anyone wanted to help with it? It'll be fun!
I got stuff like — [He counts off on his fingers.] learning how to kniiit, surfiiing, learning origaaami... Holding a really big snake? When I was a kid I always wanted to face my fears and hold a snake, and I almost got a chance to, but then I remembered how scary snakes are and chickened out...!
[He waves at someone down below, sounding so happy.]
Heeeey! You wanna hug?! I have 'give a stranger a hug' on my to do list!
['Dude, what are you doing on a roof at eleven at night?!' the teenaged kid calls back.]
I'm drunk!
['I guess I can hug you?!' Peter fist pumps.]
Awesome!
[The kid down below yells back from cupped hands: 'Hey—! You're gonna break your neck up there! Get down!']
It's cool, I've got really good balance!
[He gives the guy a thumbs up. This is all still recording. Save him.]
[THUMP, CLATTER, A CURSE WORD THAT STARTS WITH 'MOTHER' THAT COMES FROM A POLITE LITTLE VOICE.]
Wheeew — Helloooo Riverview!
[There's a shuffling of feet as the familiar voice carries further away, like he's walking away from the feed. Someone calls distantly: 'Enjoy your glory years, kid!']
Thank you, sir! Where's the tram...? Which street again — Oh! I dropped my — [Dropped his phone. Oops. Right! He picks it up, squinting into the feed; Peter looks — well, drunk. He's very drunk. He whispers a little lower:] Hey, sorry, oops — sorry, it's late and I'm kinda noisy. I'll shut up. Shhhh.
[He staggers sideways in his attempt to sneak quietly, so there's that.]
Guys, I was, like, so worried about drinking? But I feel great! Mr. Wilson, thanks for helping me loosen up a little; I dunno why I was even nervous. I even did the karaoke thing on my own. Like, the thing on my bucket list? Man... It was so fun... I don't think I had that much fun in... I don't even know when. Heh. I love you guys. [He whispers in a giggle to himself, looking around and ignoring the feed for a moment:] I have noooo idea where I'm at... Oh, wait! that's Centerfield Lane, I'm doing great...!
But where's the tram again? Shit. Iiii mean 'crap'. Crap is what I meant.
Uuuuh. Hold on. [The feed blacks out again, and there's the telltale sounds of someone clearly climbing up a fire escape toward someone's roof. He's very coordinated for a drunk teenager.] There we go! I seeeee it now. Cool, awesome. Cool.
[He looks at the feed again, the background higher up.]
So I was thinking! I've been spending soooo much time moping about stuff I can't, uuuuh. Do anything about, so I was figuring... why not relax a little? I got this To Do List thing I wanna get done, and I was wondering if anyone wanted to help with it? It'll be fun!
I got stuff like — [He counts off on his fingers.] learning how to kniiit, surfiiing, learning origaaami... Holding a really big snake? When I was a kid I always wanted to face my fears and hold a snake, and I almost got a chance to, but then I remembered how scary snakes are and chickened out...!
[He waves at someone down below, sounding so happy.]
Heeeey! You wanna hug?! I have 'give a stranger a hug' on my to do list!
['Dude, what are you doing on a roof at eleven at night?!' the teenaged kid calls back.]
I'm drunk!
['I guess I can hug you?!' Peter fist pumps.]
Awesome!
[The kid down below yells back from cupped hands: 'Hey—! You're gonna break your neck up there! Get down!']
It's cool, I've got really good balance!
[He gives the guy a thumbs up. This is all still recording. Save him.]
no subject
Peter raises both hands and drags them down his face. ]
Oh my god.
[ That's how you know this is serious. A two-handed face palm. ]
Please don't tell me you just... drank whatever a bunch of strangers gave you.
no subject
The bartender was there! And it was just from those two nice girls! It wasn't anything weird, and — and they were already hammered anyways, so they were totally harmless...! It's not like I took it from a creepy dude twirling a mustache!
[Yeah, this isn't a kid who ever really went to parties or to bars.
... And would have definitely not drank until he was legally able to in New York.
So this is all new concerning territory.]
no subject
[ Breathed out this time, as he pinches the bridge of his nose.
Deep breath, Quill. You can handle this.
He drops one hand to his lap, and with the other, he pushes the glass of water closer to Little Pete. ]
Rule one: never accept candy from strangers. Even if they're wasted and seem nice.
no subject
Defeatedly, in a low voice:]
They were really persuasive... And pretty...
no subject
You've still gotta be careful, man.
[ A beat. Then, ]
The first time I met Gamora, I got distracted by how smoking hot she was, right? She was being all flirty, and she was clearly totally into me.
Then she stole something from me and almost killed me.
[ Love at first sight.
The bartender, it seems, has deposited a beer in front of Peter instead of a second glass of water, apparently sensing that he definitely needs one. He shoots her a grateful look before taking a quick sip of it. ]
So, you know. You can't always trust a pretty face.
no subject
... Mine was more about not trusting their crazy criminal dad...
[He sips his water, shifty-eyed, and clears his throat.]
... My dating life's already a mess.
no subject
(Girlfriends with fucked up father-figures?
... yeah. Peter might know a thing or two about that.)
He leans forward on the table, propping himself up with an elbow. ]
You'll get the hang of it.
[ Eventually. ]
You're feelin' alright, though? [ At the very least, Peter seems to understand that this needs a little clarification, so— ]
You don't feel like you need to pass out or puke or anything?
1/2
But blinks up at Big Pete.]
... Tired, mostly. To be honest, that's just the usual. But now I'm gonna try harder.
[What does that even elude to? We may never know-]
no subject
Ohmygod, that looks sogood. Pete, you see this?!
[IT HAS. EVERYTHING. SO MUCH. THE TOPPINGS
He beams up at the pub lady like she's made his entire life.]
Thanks so much, really, this is great. You're my favorite person.
[Said pub lady shakes her head and smiles as she wanders off again.]
no subject
Anything he might have gleaned goes lost when the kid lights up like a Christmas tree, and Peter huffs out a breath, something caught between the crossroads of “amused” and “exasperated.” But because he can, Peter scoops up a chip – one of the ones toward the center that’s piled with a bunch of the toppings – and pops it into his mouth.
As he chews (because he is a savage), ]
Have you ever had alcohol before tonight?
no subject
[He's just gonna talk with his mouth full, too. We're all animals here.]
Mishter Wilshon — [gulp] Gave me some. First it was, like, pure — bourbon? And he laughed at me, but then he did this cool thing with orange juice and it wasn't too bad. Getting drunk's on my bucket list, and that made me super-duper bold. So here I am.
[Where are these nachos going? He's destroying them. He's leaving no man alive.]
no subject
He is, however, watching to make sure the kid doesn’t literally devour the plate. ]
Just so you know, the first couple times you get drunk? You should have a spotter.
Also you should probably drink more water before you hit the hay tonight.
no subject
[Code: 'I aint' going to sleep, I'm partying, I feel awesome.'
(Little does he know, drunk people aren't always able to decide when and where to sleep.)
He looks pleased, though.]
This is maybe the best food I've ever had. I was starved.
... Y'want sommore?
[He nudges the plate.]
no subject
Nah. I'm good. It's all yours.
Just... pace yourself, or you're seriously gonna barf.
1/2
no subject
... I think I'm gonna barf.
[He barfs.]
no subject
... Dude.
[ Sighed out, this time, and when the woman looks over to the pair of them with an expression of complete discontent, Peter just shakes his head in equal parts apology and helplessness.
Predictably, she sighs and heads off in search of cleaning implements.
When the kid seems to have finished, Peter deftly sidesteps the mess, coming up behind the kid running a hand up his back. ]
I'm not gonna say, "I told you so."
[ ... though technically, he just has. ]
Do you want me to take you to the bathroom, or was that all you've got?
no subject
[He looks entirely like he's gonna puke again, but he swallows and looks over at where the lady at the counter vanished, with genuine panic and guilt. As to be expected at this rate, but at least it's not guilt over something really intense, right? It's barfed nachos.]
I'm sssso, so, sorry, Miss Publady! I'll clean it up — I'll — I'll get a mop! D'you got a mop?
[His stomach churns again as he tries to untangle his legs from his chair, staying about as green as he started.
Not Gamora green, but you know what how it is.]
no subject
Which is weird, considering he spent most of his life around aliens, but apparently a few things are more or less universal, like that existential dread that crosses a person's face right before they're about to hurl. ]
Calm down. I'm sure she's dealt with this a billion times before.
[ And as the kid tries to get to his feet, Peter instead hooks the kid's arm around his shoulders, helping the kid to stand. But rather than head toward the bar, Peter aims them toward the back of the establishment. ]
Bathroom. Now.
[ In that tone of voice that shows that Peter isn't taking "no" for an answer. ]
C'mon.
no subject
His stomach churns again, and he puts a hand over his mouth.
And this, friends, is how Peter Parker ends up at a toilet in a pub at midnight with a dude who blew up his dad-planet. He just accepts his fate and expels what his body clearly doesn't want right now, and by the time he's done he's 15% more sober and embarrassed, curled up miserably on the tile floor with his arms around his legs and forehead on his knees.
Something about being babied around by someone he's technically superhero co-workers with makes it worse.
He's supposed to be more competent. And not someone people have to look out for in a pub bathroom?
His lips grimace against his jeans. He's so uncool right now. Jesus.]
M'really sorry.
no subject
He's been here before – well, obviously not here, specifically, but in this particular position. Playing designated driver to Ravagers, leaning against the frames of bathroom stalls while they puked up everything in their system and then some. He sits on his comm device, just scrolling through news feeds as he waits, and when the ugly, wet noises come to a stop, he tucks the comm away.
And there's apology five million, though Peter stopped keeping track once it hit double digits, and not for the first time, he says patiently, ]
You're fine.
[ This time, at least, he adds on, ]
How're you feelin'?
no subject
Really stupid.
... I dunno what I'm doing... m'like the Bad Example Kid in every PSA from middle school...
[He folds his arms over his head and resists the urge to go RRRRAGH like someone who lost at a game of Flappy Bird they were insanely invested in. It's a very trying thing, resisting that. And he's pretty sure the effort would just make him sick again anyway.]
May'd be so mad at me right now.
no subject
Everyone fucks up on their first night drinking.
[ This, offered a little sagely. ]
At least the worst that came of tonight, so far, is that you barfed up a plate of nachos.
You're fine, kid, even if it probably doesn't feel like it. You're doin' way better than I did my first time.
[ Not that he can offer this with any real authority. His first time getting drunk is... hazy, at best. Completely gone, at worst. ]
no subject
... Is he falling asleep?
... He's falling asleep.]
no subject
Then, he nudges the kid with his knee, just to wake him up, then loops the kid's arm around his own neck again. ]
C'mon. Don't pass out on a bathroom floor.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
1/3
2/3
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)