text - un:maverick

[deploy]

Looking for an X-Box, 2 controllers and some games.

Madden, Burnout, GTA, Tony Hawk, Fight Night, etc.

Stuff you can play while eating popcorn and drinking beer at the same time. No downers.

Will pay $$$ if you can deliver by tonight. It's an emergency.

Video. A Friendly School PSA.

[shoplifter]

 [The feed opens with a huffy looking Laura, sitting in front of the screen like it's a PSA announcement or some such — and judging from the glancing up at what must assuredly be a teacher, it's exactly that. Or something. She scowls at the camera again before looking down at the paper held in her dainty little hands that have totally never hurt anyone ever, no sir. She reads it blankly, and it's very clearly she's the worst podium speaker in the entire universe:]

I have agreed.... to read aloud, so that I will not be suspended for the week.

I would like to formally apologize for anyone I have ever stabbed, kicked, punched, or bitten... It was not my intention to hurt anyone and I will try my best from this point on to control my temper, both — in the complex and at school. [She wrinkles her nose, looks deadpan at the camera, and continues.] I am sorry to Tabitha for shoving her nose in the grass during recess. Even if it was because she was being unkind to another student, it does not give me the right to use... 'force'.

And I am sorry for using... Spanish expletives toward Jared, and hitting him in the throat with his own backpack. Even if he was being rude, it does not... excuse violence. [She looks so annoyed, save her.] From this point on, I will do my best to stay in school... for the whole school day. I will try not to leave past the wall.

[She puts the paper on the desk, calmly.]

... And I will not steal the chocolate milk from the cafeteria anymore.

[More gravely:]

But if Susan insults my accent ever again, I will shove her into the trash ca—


[huh the feed ended suddenly how about that






... she's in detention now]

text; un: dickipedia

[absolutperfection]

[He could try to do this the anon route but didn't see the point.]

I've got a couple of questions and some statements to make.
One, Peaches. If you're out there. Text me sometime.

Two, does anyone know this man. If so, please leave info on how to win him over.

Lastly. I've figured this whole thing out.
Why they bring use here.
It's because we're all so damn attractive.
Look around.
Bet there's not a single person here that doesn't fit that description.

UPDATED: I am not referring to children. I'm sure they're all cute though.

[Contributing to the network - yes. High quality - debatable.]

video; @c.silva

[childofaxios]

[ When the video kicks in, it's clear that Chyler is in one of the Perimeter Guard's offices. She's standing close to the lens, adjusting the feed until it lines up to her satisfaction. Then she steps back and stands at attention.

For one brief, brief, oh-so-brief moment there's a flicker of exasperation on her face. Then she locks her gaze on nothing in particular and shouts like she's in the middle of a drill: ]

MY NAME IS CADET SILVA AND I AM A CLOCK.

[ A pause, oh-so-brief a pause, but her expression doesn't waver this time. ]

IF AT ANY POINT YOU REQUIRE THE LOCAL TIME, IT IS MY DUTY TO PROVIDE IT DOWN TO THE SECOND. I AM REQUIRED TO DO THIS REGARDLESS OF WHERE I AM OR WHAT I AM DOING AT THE TIME OF YOUR REQUEST.

IF AT ANY POINT I REFUSE, PLEASE INFORM PERIMETER GUARD SQUAD LEADER JOHN SHEPPARD OF RR-1.

[ Chyler snaps off a salute, then reaches forward and turns off the feed with equal crispness. ]