text; un: dickipedia

[absolutperfection]

[He could try to do this the anon route but didn't see the point.]

I've got a couple of questions and some statements to make.
One, Peaches. If you're out there. Text me sometime.

Two, does anyone know this man. If so, please leave info on how to win him over.

Lastly. I've figured this whole thing out.
Why they bring use here.
It's because we're all so damn attractive.
Look around.
Bet there's not a single person here that doesn't fit that description.

UPDATED: I am not referring to children. I'm sure they're all cute though.

[Contributing to the network - yes. High quality - debatable.]

Comments

un: ren

[killthepast]

[ Oh, hey, that's a picture of his boss, Alexander Pierce aka Yet Another Replacement Father Figure for Ren to shove all of his daddy issues onto ]

Why the interest in that man?

[absolutperfection]

He's hot.

Doesn't have your hair though. ;)

[storradr]

[He's definitely frowning a bit as he responds.]

A lot of children are brought here... Including mine...

[Could you please not call his children attractive...]

[absolutperfection]

Ragnar, look.
I wasn't talking about kids. :|
That's creepy.

[Wait.]

Your kids are here?

text | un: iron.man

[buildsomething]

What the fuck.

[Yes, that's helpful, Stark.]

Why do you want to win him over, exactly?

[absolutperfection]

Not your type then?
He's good looking.
That's why.

[ private ]

[dothelokimotion]

So he is a threat.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Hmm. ]

Foot massages. He's old after all. I hear the geriatric are particularly fond of those.

[absolutperfection]

Good point.

First. I'm not sure he'd like someone he's recently acquainted with rubbing his feet.
Second. I don't want to rub his feet.

But.. hello. ;)

un: anonymous; text

[krasnaya_vdova]

You tried chess? Maybe a couple mugs of whiskey tea and a crossword puzzle?

Why are you so interested in him, anyway?

[Apparently her desire to keep Pierce away from Bucky extends to people that have faces that are strangely similar. Who knew.]

[absolutperfection]

Those are very specific suggestions.
Do you know him?

It's shallow.
I think he's attractive.

→ actualwizard666

[wiccant]

Then they wouldn't have brought the kids in the first place, right?
I think that debunks your theory.

[absolutperfection]

No, I just meant that.
I don't find kids attractive.

Someone thought I was saying that. I wasn't.

Only the of age people. They're good looking.

text; un: ghostking

[deathkid]

hey, TJ.
that's an... interesting theory.
i have to agree that there are a lot of attractive people here
but there's also some not-so-attractive.
imo.

[absolutperfection]

Hey nico
Not that I’ve met.

[TJ hits send on the next text before he over thinks it.]

How’ve you been?

text: un scavenger.rey

[talentedscavenger]

Why do you want more information on Alexander?

[absolutperfection]

So I can charm him.

( text; ) un: shigeru miyata

[mysophobic]

[ Shigeru doesn't know who this man is or anything like that but he finds this cute?! He's also a pure cinnamon roll who wants to help people fall in love so he will offer up some suggestions. ]

Maybe try finding out what kinds of foods he likes so you can make him something?

[ He makes Genji food all the time and the other man loves that so... ]

[absolutperfection]

That’s the best suggestion yet.
I should ask him that.

[TJ doesn’t think for a second that Alex will give him the time of day. Maybe, if the guy is feeling experimental, a night but not a relationship. Which he doesn’t want. Or maybe he does. Sighs at Peaches.]

Know anybody that can cook?

text; un: d.pavus

[tevinteraltus]

What an upstanding looking gentleman. Send him a fruit basket, or an assorted collection of loose-leaf teas. He seems equally likely to appreciate either. Be sure, however, to send it anonymously. He looks to enjoy a good chase.

And yes, you may be right about that. I apologize in advance for providing such staunch competition in that regard.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'd never apologize for being fiendishly attractive and pleasantly quick-witted.

[absolutperfection]

When I get the funds, I'll do both.
Anon. Are you sure?
What if he likes confidence?

Are you going after Alex too?
Please say you are. We can tag team him.

text; un:KingFisherman

[brotrips]

If you find everybody attractive, it jt sounds like you have low standards.

[absolutperfection]

Or that I’m not picky.
Everyone is beautiful to somebody

@captainjack [text]

[fixedpointintime]

Might I suggest simply talking directly to him, if you're interested?

[absolutperfection]

If he still wants to talk to me after this.
I didn’t think it through.

text; un: Angelus.ignis

[wayfaring_stranger]

That is an interesting theory.

I've read only one question and two requests, but you have the "some statements" part right.

[absolutperfection]

Probably not a good theory
But I thought everyone needed to hear it.

I lost track of what I was doing.
Tell me your thoughts on this.

text - private; un: Snowpiercer

[peacemongering]

[He specifically waits more than a few days before answering to this point. It was rather public and people did offer some interesting suggestions. He had seen a few people who would likely slander his name a bit, but from what he could tell, TJ flirted with almost anything that had too legs and a pulse.]

Should I be flattered that I've earned part of a public post about wooing, Mr. Hammond?

[absolutperfection]

Alex.

[TJ only feels bad about the way he treats or approaches people when it’s pointed out. Fortunately, nobody has yet. He flirts because it feels good, temporarily boosts his mood, and distracts him from the long list of things he should probably deal with.]

Maybe. If it hadn’t gone the way it had. Got some good advice. Learned some shit you probably wish hadn’t come up.