video; un: ny4n

[ichimyatsu]

[The feed buzzes on to Ichimatsu looking boredly down with his hand resting on one fist, his other clearly setting the phone up to record. Despite how often he looks bored, this time he looks a little perturbed, as well, and he glances up at the phone after a while, shifting its view a moment later. It shows a large wooden chest, in the corner of a relatively nondescript room, and the inside of the chest is sectioned off into several segments, most of which are... filled with plants, be they dried or in seed form. He slowly moves the view across the entire chest, and then sets it back on a shelf, or a windowsill, where it can focus on him as he sets his cheek back against his fist.]

...so I've had this chest of plants for almost a fucking year now. I completely forgot about them, and all the labels are... burnt, it looks like. Somehow the plants are okay? They're weird space plants, they all do weird shit. I remember two of them, but not their names.

[A long silence, and he shifts to uncurl his hand and set his chin in his palm, instead.]

...guess I'm gonna be selling some weird space plant extracts once I figure out what they all do again. Anybody interested? Or, for that matter, anybody know anything about plants? Reaper, Karamatsu, you two remember these things?

[ooc; Ssssso these are plants Ichimatsu's had since he was in Eluvio. There was an event in that game where the ship visited a planet with seven districts based off the seven sins, and characters were allowed to harvest and keep flora from the districts. The moderation of that game has since locked the post with the actual names/effects of those plants, so I'll be working off memory for effects and making up new names, but the plants bear no actual resemblance to any other existing flora. Feel free to have any botany-smart people tell him as much! ...also hi I changed usernames.]

Comments

[video] un: b1gbrother

[relieable]

[squint.... SQUINTS HARDER]

Ichimacchan. Why're you hoarding weird space plants? Are they drugs? Are you tryin' t'sell drugs?!

pls excuse my phone tags

[nyahilistic]

I’m not hoarding them, I forgot I had them, and they’re plants, not drugs.

Re: pls excuse my phone tags

[relieable]

Ah! I can’t believe my cute little brother is going down this path! I always knew you were dark, but this is just sad!

[nyahilistic]

Osomatsu, did you even listen to anything I just said.

[relieable]

[dramatically shoves his face into his hands]

Oh! Poor Ichimacchan! The thug! Reduced to a life of crime because we didn't watch him better! Pretty soon, he'll be completely unrecognizable! He'll get into fights and his face will get all scarred up! He'll live in a one-room apartment and cry himself to sleep every night as he reflects on everything he's lost! Then, in the daytime, he'll bully little kids into smoking his drugs! He'll have a posse of cats that sneaks drugs into peoples' pockets to get them addicted! Pretty soon, we're all on heroin! All because of Ichimatsu!

[nyahilistic]

[He lets his brother have his little fit, watching the feed for a moment, then looking past his phone, and eventually rolling his eyes and shifting the plants around in the chest while he rambles.]

Mm-hmm. I have been thinking of getting a haircut, do you think I should shave my head on one side? Maybe steal some of Karamatsu's gel, spike it up? Really look the part.

[relieable]

Augh! [he grabs the sides of his head] You're gonna kill me way too early!

[nyahilistic]

I mean I am friends with Reaper-- but seriously, fucking listen when I talk! They're not drugs.

[relieable]

[huff!]

You said they're weird space plants that do weird shit! What does that even mean, huh? Whadda they do?

[nyahilistic]

Weird space plants that do weird shit doesn't make them drugs! I don't remember what they all do individually, the labels wore off. [Burnt, off, it looks like.]

[relieable]

Isn't that all the more reason to... you know... not touch them?

[nyahilistic]

[Face in hands.]

I tried them before, and I only kept the ones that did good stuff. Help you relax, help you sleep, ... [He doesn't mention the Superbia plant that hid flaws.]

Besides, why aren't you all gung-ho for me capitalizing on weird space plants? I could probably make a lot of money this way.

[relieable]

Because drugs, Ichimacchan! I don't want a drug-dealer for a little brother! No amount of money is wo---

[a pause]

Well, maybe a little bit of extra cash would be good.

[nyahilistic]

[He rolls his eyes.]

I'm not a drug dealer. I ran a new age shop on the ship and they sold well there, so I kept a stock to grow and dry them to sell extracts.

[He squints.]

But if you don't want a drug dealer for a little brother, I guess I won't share any profits I make, since it's drug money. [Ichimatsu you brat.]

[relieable]

[he squints back. oh, we're playing this game, now, are we? hmph! Osomatsu makes a lot of money. he doesn't need yours...]

...............You gonna run a shop here, then?

[nyahilistic]

[Hey, you spoiled him into this. You only have yourself to blame.]

[He shrugs, plucking a leaf from one of the plants and chewing on it, making a face.]

I'unno, maybe.

[relieable]

[ICHIMACCHAAAAAAN! DON'T EAT THAT]

...You gonna need help?

[nyahilistic]

[How else is he supposed to figure out what they do. He sticks his tongue out, picking up a notebook he apparently also had stashed in the chest and writing a few notes.] Oh, now you wanna be a drug dealer, niisan?

[relieable]

Not a drug dealer! But...

[he looks away for a moment]

Might be nice workin' somewhere else. The cafe is okay but...

[nyahilistic]

[He chitters a laugh, shaking his head.]

So now it's not drug dealing? I dunno, I won't have a "shop" set up for a while, and I have no idea if it'll be lucrative enough for employees.

[A beat.] What I mean to say is, don't quit the cafe, but if I make decent off selling not-drug plants, we can work something out. [He sounds so... official. Business-like. That's weird.]

[relieable]

[that's very weird! but not... unlike Ichimatsu? Osomatsu doesn't know]

...Heh. We could have a family business! I think that'd be cute...

[nyahilistic]

If you think I'm letting Karamatsu touch these plants you're crazier than I thought.

[relieable]

[aww! that makes him chuckle. at least he's not calling Ichimatsu a drug-dealer anymore]

But you guys spent all that extra time together, right? Aren't you better friends now? [like they were friends in the first place?!]

[nyahilistic]

...two months, and then I guess a few here. He insists we're friends now but he's still not touching my plants, he'd probably kill them on complete accident.

[relieable]

Heh heh heeeeh! I dunno! Karamatsu seems like a flower-kinda guy, don't you think? [this is not an AU, Osomatsu]