un: b.zethir, text;
So tell me something.
If someone wants to go home the people in charge here will do their best to get the portal aligned so they can do just that. At the same time, there's no guarantee they'll ever manage that that someone. Which means that a person waiting for a chance to go home could end up waiting not just for weeks or months but years. Maybe even the rest of their blighted life.
Knowing this, do you think it's better to hold back putting down roots just to make it easier to get up and go if the time comes? Even if it means you may be living your life among the people but distinctly separate from them as they build their lives here?
Or is it stupid to waste time, to waste your life and potential happiness on the off chance that one day you may get to return home one day?
[Is she just being stubborn because she won't be a Council Agent anymore if she doesn't return home, or because it feels like she's selling out for an easier lifestyle and having magic at long last? Her pride and sense of honor stings at the thought. The idea of never seeing her family again, of trading them up these things makes her taste ashes in her mouth. Then again she doesn't really have a choice in the matter right now anyway. She's not actually giving anything up at this point.
Really, the more she thinks about it, the more she's coming to realize that no matter what happens, she's going to have to make sacrifices of one sort or another.]
If any has an opinion or any insight I'd appreciate it.
[There's only so long she can sit on this fence before she drives herself even crazier than she feels now.]
If someone wants to go home the people in charge here will do their best to get the portal aligned so they can do just that. At the same time, there's no guarantee they'll ever manage that that someone. Which means that a person waiting for a chance to go home could end up waiting not just for weeks or months but years. Maybe even the rest of their blighted life.
Knowing this, do you think it's better to hold back putting down roots just to make it easier to get up and go if the time comes? Even if it means you may be living your life among the people but distinctly separate from them as they build their lives here?
Or is it stupid to waste time, to waste your life and potential happiness on the off chance that one day you may get to return home one day?
[Is she just being stubborn because she won't be a Council Agent anymore if she doesn't return home, or because it feels like she's selling out for an easier lifestyle and having magic at long last? Her pride and sense of honor stings at the thought. The idea of never seeing her family again, of trading them up these things makes her taste ashes in her mouth. Then again she doesn't really have a choice in the matter right now anyway. She's not actually giving anything up at this point.
Really, the more she thinks about it, the more she's coming to realize that no matter what happens, she's going to have to make sacrifices of one sort or another.]
If any has an opinion or any insight I'd appreciate it.
[There's only so long she can sit on this fence before she drives herself even crazier than she feels now.]
Voice - @lolococo416
Just... don't get attached, not too much. I guess. Cause even if you don't go home, it doesn't mean everyone else stays...
un: b.zethir, text;
I've already been doing a balancing act like that for the last seven months. It's not longer acceptable for me.
[And the thought of selfishly devoting herself to her own enjoyment while keeping others at arms length feels...shallow. A slap in the face to her past self who was doing so much more. Being so much more.]
Thinking about others leaving while I stay, however, does make me realize it's preferable to being the one who leaves. So thank you for that...
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*Lola's pretty sure she gets where this other person is coming from, a little. This username has been around as long as Lola's been here.*
It's always better to be the one making the choice, doesn't mean it's nicer. You're not whoever you were when you got here, that's probably good to remember too.
text @LOKIOFASGARD
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What do you feel could tip the scales against that?
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It seems like it isn't troubling many people the way that it is me, however. Maybe I'm overthinking it.
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text - RE-L124C41+
I have a feeling everyone here struggles with this in some shade or another.
Living a half life, where ever you are, is incredibly empty though. Even in your home world you live with the uncertainty of what every day will bring, just being in this place amplifies it.
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Have you come to any conclusions yourself?
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All you can do is make decisions on what you have and know now. Waiting around isn't productive in any sense.
I'm just going to live by my own rulings while I'm here. If the time comes to go, I'll decide from there what to do.
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[Though Re-L can't see it, Bryn pauses to scrub her face with her hand. It's hard to shake the feeling that that she may be betraying her oaths to do that, but perhaps it's the fact that she's enjoying the time away that's troubling her most.]
It doesn't trouble you to think of how much harder the decision will be if you've settled in here in the meantime?
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text | un: medraut
What happened?
1/2
A lot of little things over the last seven months. A few big things as well. All of which the sort to make me think about my life here versus my life home and...yeah. And then recently...honestly that part is better explained in person I think.
But I'm fine. I mean, nothing happened in the bad way.
2/2
[She's just saying, just in case he thinks she's cradling a bottle of whiskey in her empty bathtub while ugly crying to sad songs or something melodramatic like that.]
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My advice is, don't waste your own time.
I'm at Gramarye if you want to talk.
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That's the plan. Figure this shit out one way or the other and go with it.
And yeah, that sounds good. I can pop by your...office? Do you have an office there?
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text | un: d.grayson
But I think the honest answer tends to be more complicated than that.
[ To say it's been on his mind lately would be a an understatement. ]
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The fact that it's so complicated is part of why I've come to the network here to see if anyone has any great insight or enlightenment on the subject. It was my hope that enough people sharing their experiences would be enough to help me sort my own thoughts out.
We'll see if that actually happens or not, of course.
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And I kind of have to believe the past isn't a closed book. But it's hard not to wonder how much of that is wishful thinking.
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text | un: w.west
So my advice to someone would be to focus on the here and now if they can. I know that is easier said than done, but nobody really knows what the future will bring.
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Focusing on the here and now is probably about all we can do in the end...
Have you been finding that easy for you?
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[ Trying to figure out what his life is rather than focusing on what it was is something he has been dealing with even before he arrived here a few months ago. ]
I do know that being adrift like I have been isn't working for me, that I want something more. Knowing that hasn't made things any simpler, though.
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text | un: c.andor
[not that he's asking for homeworld details et all, but it all just seems far more circumstantial to a dead man. it kind of changes his perspective from what it might have been before scarif, because he knows his answer would be the first one if he had anything waiting for him.]
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The fact that everyone has different things back home and different perspectives is what I'm counting on. It helps as much to hear from people who are in different situations as it does from those who are in the same.
As for living here and not putting down roots...that's more or less what I've been doing since I arrived. And that's where the second part of my question comes into play. I'm not necessarily asking people what they think I should do but how they are or would treat this decision.
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So then your problem has become exhaustion with your current way of life here.
I have not been here long enough to give you a good answer, but I would always keep your own situation in mind first. It sounds like you might be ready for a change either way.
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