[video | un: unbeatablesg]

[partiallysquirrelblood]

[The video starts, showing a young woman with a bright bucktoothed grin, wearing a squirrel ear headband. There's a squirrel in a pink bow riding on her shoulder.]

Hey there Riverview. I'm Doreen Green. Also the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl. Normally, there's kind of a whole secret identity deal? But between showing up in costume and all the scans it...didn't seem really like it would work out here.

This is Tippy-Toe [The squirrel hops off Doreen's shoulder so the camera can get a better look at her.] She's my best squirrel friend and also the most awesome squirrel on this or any other planet. This is absolutely true, and I won't hear anyone say otherwise.

...well technically I will, since it's not like I'll suddenly go deaf if someone does say otherwise. I'm just going to ignore them.

Comments

video @lightemup

[umbrastaff]

I think 'unbeatable squirrel girl' is my new favorite superhero name.

Re: video @lightemup

[partiallysquirrelblood]

Thanks. It's mine too, but that's probably mostly the bias talking.

[umbrastaff]

Hey, it's fucking great, biased or not! Guessing you have squirrel powers?

video; un: yakyuu.luvr

[yakyuuman]

[ He had a fair deal of superheroes he met here and even befriended so this doesn't surprise him at all, although seeing someone being so bravely upfront about her identity is also unusual and totally up his valley on things he likes. ]

Hey hey hey hey I'm Jyushimatsu! Hi to you both!

[ And that squirrel is really cute! He pokes at the screen with a sleeve-covered finger, wishing he could pet squirrel in real life! ]

A bunch people are open about their hero-ness here as far as I know so don't worry! Just be careful that some crazy cultists don't try to kidnap you!

Re: video; un: yakyuu.luvr

[partiallysquirrelblood]

If they tried I'd probably just kick their butts.

[yakyuuman]

[ Hey. Hey... he likes you. ]

We already did when half the city was kidnapped by them, but if they tried again I'd like to see you in action!

Do you have super cool powers?

audio un:pnwsalex

[11calls]

I can't say that I've ever seen a squirrel that tame before. Welcome to Riverview!

Re: audio un:pnwsalex

[partiallysquirrelblood]

Most squirrels are pretty friendly, You just need to know how to talk to them. In their own language.

[11calls]

Oh, I'm afraid I don't know how to do that.

[Or if that's a thing in her world. It's not really.]

But hi anyway. I'm Alex.

video; @falcon

[wingedman]

...really? Squirrels? And I thought the bug-themed heroes were- [be tactful, Sam, be tactful] off the wall.



[Pot, kettle, etc. He's well aware.]

Re: video; @falcon

[partiallysquirrelblood]

You can say weird, dude. Weird is cool. There's so much stuff I wouldn't be able to do if I wasn't weird.

[wingedman]

Hey, man, if you own it, it's fine with me. So does that mean you have like...squirrel powers or something? Like Spider-Man?

Were you bitten by a radioactive squirrel? [How does a squirrel become irradiated? (How does a spider become irradiated?)]

video

[tevinteraltus]

[ Dorian actually watches this video feed for a moment before speaking. He looks very confused. ]

Is that a moniker you've chosen for yourself?

Re: video

[partiallysquirrelblood]

Yeah. I'm part squirrel. It's kind of my whole deal. Well, not my whole deal? No one thing should be anyone's whole deal, but it is a significant part of my deal.

video

[tevinteraltus]

You're part-

[ He pinches the bridge of his nose before continuing. ]

Of course you are. Why "unbeatable", though?

audio @scavenger.rey

[talentedscavenger]

[Well, Rey was going to focus on the whole 'secret identity' thing, but well, there's a Squirrel that has a pink bow.

.....It's stupidly cute. Why is it cute?]

How did you get that bow on your Squirrel?

Re: audio @scavenger.rey

[partiallysquirrelblood]

[Doreen shrugs.]

I asked her if she wanted one, and she said yes. I can talk to squirrels, so it wasn't really hard.

[audio -> video]

[talentedscavenger]

[Talking to animals...okay, that's not new, but it's still pretty cool.]

Can you talk to other animals? Like...

[She switches to video so Doreen can actually see her and points to a porg.]

This one?

video | @ilikehorses

[shoplifter]

... Hello, Squirrel Girl.

[So many heroes around here; Laura has a hard time keeping track, especially with so many universes at play. But Doreen at least seems really interesting and enjoyable company — anyone who refers to an animal as a best friend wins points, honestly. She has to ask, though:]

Did you name her yourself? Or is that her — birth name?

[Do squirrels have names that they secretly pass back and forth, away from human ears?]

Re: video | @ilikehorses

[partiallysquirrelblood]

It's her birth name. Names ending with an "oh" sound are pretty common with squirrels, even if Tippy's anything but.

That does give me a great opportunity to ask what yours is, though.

video

[shoplifter]

My name is Laura. It is nice to meet you, Doreen Green; I like that it rhymes.

Are you a mutant?

[Sorry, that's like, one of her top questions.]

video; @dreamsunwind

[mistyday]

Well now, if that ain't the cutest damn squirrel I've ever seen!

Re: video; @dreamsunwind

[partiallysquirrelblood]

Tippy-Toe's pretty great, yeah.

[And anyone admitting that automatically wins points with her and Doreen.]

audio, un: s.uris

[stantheman]

What does being the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl mean?

Re: audio, un: s.uris

[partiallysquirrelblood]

Punching criminals in the face with metaphorical fists made of carefully constructed arguments that teach them to reconsider the life choices that led them to a life of crime in the first place.

Also punching criminals in the face with actual fists.