video; un: liches.get.stitches

[spellslots]

[Today on your screen is everybody's favorite shitty wizard, who's currently sitting in a park somewhere and using mage hand to make sure the camera is at a good angle.

#priorities]

What's up, my dudes? It's ya boy Taako, here to make a super important announcement to save anyone getting their panties in a twist about this shit.

[He's already nailing this whole polite and informative announcement thing.]

Soooo, the people here aren't evil. [Taako shrugs.] It's a fucking revelation, I know, but listen, they're not lying about the whole portal thing and we're not here to be turned into people soup or whatever the hell folks are worried about. I mean, there's for sure some dicks in the bunch so totally not my fault if you get mugged, but uh, the people overall? Have good intentions.

[There's a shrug there, just to finish off his very well-constructed explanation.

Although he should probably also say how he knows this:]

The spirit of some real old and powerful witch told me this shit, bee-tee-dubs, and yeah, before you ask, I know she was telling the truth. That's how the spell works.

[Just take his word for it, folks!

He looks like he's about to hang up, before pausing.]

Uh, right, there's a whole new load of us idiots, isn't there? Hi, I'm Taako, in case you missed it when I said it thirty seconds ago, and that's T-double-A-K-O, not like the food. Sorry to start you off on such a fucking boring note, but here we are. Welcome to Riverview Quarantine or whatever.

[ok bye]

Comments

video; @stark.naked

[amelioraate]

[ ... what the fuck just happened. Tony actually has no idea what the hell this guy just said and--]

Was there a point to any of that, or did you just find really good lighting in the part and have to take advantage of it?

[spellslots]

I mean... both?

[Both is good.]

Was I not clear on the part where the dudes running this joint aren't secretly evil?

[That's what he was going for.]

[amelioraate]

...no, no you weren't all that clear. Though that does make me wonder why the hell you thought it was information worth broadcasting? I mean, have there been thoughts about the people here being evil or are you just like... two months late on being able to figure shit out?

[ Is Tony a little more of an annoyed shit as of late? Maybe. Sorry Takko, your irrelevant information and complete inability to be succinct is annoying to him.

Not to mention the whole old and powerful witch thing. Maybe it's a magic thing.]

@dodger/audio

[smokedout]

Didn't realize there was anything to get worried about, thanks for riling up anyone who's paranoid enough to think that shit in the first place.

They'll probably think you're in on it.

[Why does he think this? Because he's absolutely that paranoid. But he's probably not going to be suspicious of a flamboyant pointy-eared dude who speaks like a teenage girl.]

[spellslots]

Yup, you caught me, I'm being bribed to make sure no one discovers the real secret of why we're here.

[He was trying to be helpful!!!!!]

[smokedout]

Seriously, what kinda secret would they have - they need us to jumpstart the economy with our fat overindulgent asses?

[He scoffs quietly.]

I doubt anyone worth worrying about would use hilarious incompetence as their excuse to kidnap people. Three second's guesswork makes it a pretty believable claim that they just fucked up.

@fulcrum; text

[seditionist]

How does the old and powerful witch know what their intentions are?

[spellslots]

The powerful part?

There's kind of a limited amount of shit I could ask her, but the spell itself guarantees truth. If she hadn't known, she would've said so.

[seditionist]

[He's not really sure whether or not he believes in this. But...]

Well, that sounds logical. As much as it can.

@cjk [ text ]

[signifies]

Did the spirit tell you anything else?

[spellslots]

Only asked three questions about here, the other two were about home.

[A little selfish maybe, but he felt he covered the important topics about Riverview.]

I asked about the oil, she said it wasn't a threat. Or that it isn't now, so not all that reassuring.

video | @2b

[howlongiwonder]

Roger.

[A strange woman you never saw before responds. Must be one of the new arrivals.]

That's good to hear.

[She sounds very matter of fact, with little emotion.]

[spellslots]

[Thank you for appreciating the announcement.]

Right? Like I've had enough of people seeming cool only to be secretly trying to kill me, gets real boring real fast.

[That's only happened twice Taako, chill.]

@s.uchiha

[eyeforaneye]

What spell? Are you summoning the spirits of the dead?

[ Because I swear to god-- ]

I assume you must have some kind of reputation as a trustworthy individual if you're expecting this to be taken at face value.

[spellslots]

"Summoning" isn't really the right way to put it, she was already there, I just reached out to have a chat.

But sure? I guess? If you want people to vouch for me they probably will.

[Superman would. What other reference do you need?]

❝ voice ❞ — id: muckraker

[contacts]

[ taako will have to forgive lois' scepticism. she's willing to believe that magic is real, given that aliens are and she's currently in a whole new universe, but - ]

The spirit of an old and powerful witch told you the people here aren't evil?

[ right. ]

What kind of spell is this? Could you tell me more about it?

[spellslots]

That's about it, yup.

[The phrasing of the question - more curious than outright dismissive - stops him from getting immediately annoyed the way he did with Tony, at least. But he's still not used to people who are so skeptical of magic.]

It's a divination ritual, long and short of it is that I like, open my mind to powerful spirits or entities that are, uh... nearby, I guess? But in like a metaphysical sense, they don't have to be floating around next to me, ya feel? The spell itself stops 'em from lying, but I only get real short answers. That's kinda the trade off.

un: ghostking

[deathkid]

No spell is perfect, and unless you have the ability to exert your will over the dead, they can still deceive you.

What evidence do you have that the witch wasn't lying beside how your spell supposedly works?

[spellslots]

I mean, how the spell works is how the spells works.

[He doesn't really... understand the question. It's an integral part of the spell that the truth is told (because usually the DM is the one answering).]

There's no option where it only half works, either it does or it doesn't, and it did. Up to you whether you believe me or not, I give no shits.

private video » un: LOKIOFASGARD

[ikols]

[ Herein rolls the one person who isn't going to question 'that's how the spell works because it does'. In fact, he has some roundabout questions instead. ]

Where was the witch located, Mister Not-A-Delicious-Taco?

[spellslots]

[He appreciates it.]

I'm not super clear on how this place's planes work yet, so I'm taking a stab at it being the equivalent of the astral plane, since she's super fucking dead.

video | @the.young

[leadintheyoung]

[ Well, the good news is Líadan is starting to get a handle on the video function and how to hold the camera, so Taako is treated to an actual centered image of her face instead of a random part of it. Guess who's happy to see him? And... also a bit surprised and excited. ]

You know magick, Taako?

[ Because while she got the important part and definitely intends to ask about it, that is clearly the point that merits addressing first and foremost. That, and, with a grin -- ]

I am almost tempted to say you've been holding out on me.

[spellslots]

[Líadan is rewarded for her efforts with a bright grin that quickly turns sheepish.]

Did I not mention that whole thing? I swear it wasn't on purposes, bubbale.

[He puts a hand on his heart to show his sincerity. Oops.]

video, un: willnotben

[barksnark]

What would people soup taste like?

[ Says he, with a needlessly thoughtful hum. Important questions need answering, my man. ]

[spellslots]

[Will why....]

Depends on the seasoning, I guess, and whatever the fuck people taste like.